Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Why I Don't Talk to People

After I read this posting http://aligamusings.blogspot.com/2008/05/shave-and-bong-hit-two-bits.html by a truly talented blogger, I began to ponder the reasons why I choose to ignore people on occasion. Friends of mine have a name for it they call it the "Jenn Baker". For those who aren't familiar with the action, the "Jenn Baker" is when you see someone you know but you either look/walk the other way or stare at them with a blank expression like you have never met them before (this usually unnerves them and they walk away, but I would only use this tactic for people who you rarely see not your mother or anyone like that). I'm also not the person who gets into conversations with complete strangers. I'm sure you are thinking, "I didn't realize Jenn was so rude or anti-social," that really isn't it at all. Let me explain. I have several reasons for this behavior. One, in my profession, I have to communicate with people all day long. Don't get me wrong - I like to communicate but I kind of get tired of it sometimes. Now, I like to communicate with people I enjoy communicating with like most colleagues, friends and family but the random salesperson and sorority sister I haven't seen in ages -- not interested. Two, this goes back to the A-Musings blog, people tend to tell me their life story. Once again, I enjoy hearing people's stories - I tell quite a bit of them myself but I don't really care about strangers stories. That sounds horrible right - I've learned not to care. I tried to explain this to Wally the other day. When we were in the Outer Banks, a woman came up to me and asked me if I would allow her daughter to watch my son. I told her no but thanks for asking. She then proceeded to tell me in about a 5-10 minute time span that her husband had been laid off because the owner of the company's son was now ready to take over the business leaving her husband without a job. He was now working on starting his own "handyman" business but they were finding it hard to make ends meet especially since they just bought this house in the Outer Banks. They were here for the month of June and that her husband wouldn't be joining her much because he had to work. It went on and on from there. I told Wally all the details and at the end of story as Wally stood there in disbelief that a complete stranger would tell me this I said, "now that is why I don't talk to people." Finally, I have limited time in this world. I know wah-wah. No one has time but you can gather more time in your life for the people that matter by cutting out the people that you decided long ago not to be friends with like former co-workers or college classmates. Where does the conversation go? I'll tell you "Oh my God. I haven't seen you in (fill in the blank) years! How are you?" To be quite honest I don't care how they are. I care how my friend Fran is or how my Aunt Lorraine is but not this person I haven't talked to in 10 years. By cutting down on these meaningless conversations, I have more time for the people that are important in my life that I sometimes don't even have the time for. Think what you will of me but it is just the way I am. I have to have set my priorities somewhere in life.

2 comments:

Fran said...

I LOVE YOU! That is the best entry (next to Julianna's) ever !! You are too friggin funny ! Don't worry Jenn - you know me... gotta get the scoop Fran ...I always stop to talk to people so I will always get the 411 for you -saving you the time - b/c we all know how you like to avoid the paparazzi (aka old sorority sisters ! lol)

Jennifer said...

This is a classic blog posting! This is the Jenn I know and love!! So glad you talk to me -- couldn't live without you.

XO