With plans to see her a week from her birthday, Wally set out on Saturday to find Granny the "perfect man." The search involved heading up Route 23 to somewhere in Sussex County. Who knew all the upright, quiet men lived in Sussex County? Apparently, they also live in a porn shop as well. Six foot five, all man, Wally came out of Sussex County's finest porn shop with "Steve" the construction worker.
Steve and the Kamienski family made their way down to EP with Steve riding in the trunk. We left him in the car until the right moment. After dinner when Grandma was receiving tame gifts like puzzles, books and flowers Wally made his way downstairs to get Steve and make the introductions. As my Aunts, Cousins, Mom and Dad sat around Grandma, we presented her with a card that said we were about to make her birthday wishes come true that is when Wally entered with Steve. My family was somewhat horrified but my Granny laughed her ass off and gave Steve a pet name half-and-half due to the fact that he had a black face and white body (go figure). Grandma left the party later that night arm and arm with Steve, the man that stands upright and keeps his mouth shut. Nothing like making your 81 year old Grandmother's birthday wish come true.