The Kamienski Chronicles

New Jersey Moms Blog Retrospect: Why I blog?

2010-07-07T13:10:00.001-04:00

Author's Note: I have been neglecting my duties of chronicling and reading the last reason why made me think I have to start doing this again.
Why I Blog
Besides being a full-time Mom, I am also a full-time public relations executive. As the resident "mommy blogger" at the agency, I am often asked questions concerning blogger relations. Questions like "would you like to attend this event?," "is this product review compelling enough?," and "would you consider doing a product giveaway on this product?" I always answer the best way I can, but truth be told I am probably not the best person to ask these questions they are better off asking the other resident mommy blogger who is WAY more influential than I ever will hope to be. Yes, I will admit it I am not the most popular blogger. I am not even sure what my VPM (viewership per month) is or if I really want to know. My personal site isn't very fancy. In fact, it is the standard polka-dot design on blogger.com. Not very original but I like it. I also don't have advertising on my site - not sure if I could convince a marketer to do so. And here is my biggest confession, I have never done a giveaway. Nope, not one. I guess I'm not considered an influencer. While these truths are a little humbling for me to admit, I still continue to blog.
Why do I blog if not for the fame and glory among my peers? For starters, I entered the blog world by the gentle nudging of a friend and client who told me to "just try it." I did and, low and behold, I loved it and became addicted to it! The same reason I started blogging is the same reason I do it today because I wanted to chronicle the life of my son and keep family and friends informed of the Kamienski's happenings. The "because" is somewhat of my blog's mission statement that I try to adhere to for the most part with a random commentary on other non-related items here and there. The funny thing is the more I blogged, the more reasons why I blogged became apparent.
New Reason Why #1 - Plain and simple, I love to blog because I love to write. From when I was a little girl, I enjoyed the art of writing. The year I entered into seventh grade my best friend and I spent our entire summer vacation writing a romance novel. My love of writing continued throughout high school with published short stories in the school's literary journal. The reason I chose the field of public relations is in large part because I get to write. However, I didn't realize how great my need to write creatively was missing until I started writing my blog. Blogging was like reuniting with a long-lost friend. Maybe I will never publish the "great American" novel, but I do have a really great story about the world's greatest kid.
New Reason Why #2 - I grew up in a home where expressing your feelings was a good thing. Saying the words "I love you" was heard often throughout my childhood home. When celebrating a birthday, anniversary or milestone event, I am known to pour my heart out in the small space given in a store-bought card. Before someone opens a card from me, the receiver can often be heard saying, "is this going to make me cry?" I am a big believer in letting those you care about know how much they mean to you. Blogging has given me the opportunity to create open love letters to my family and friends. Not only do I get to tell someone like my Mom how her unconditional love has shaped my life or how in awe of the kind of father my husband is to my son, I also get to share those feelings with all that read my blog.
New Reason Why #3 - The treasure that I have found blogging is with every post I write about my son, the more I fall in love with the person he is becoming. My son is my miracle and my blog is a constant reminder of just that fact. From my very first blog posts about his adventures at the seashore to my most recent post where I talk about how gaga he is over babies, I just can't help having my heart melt with every word I type about him.
Chances are only my friends and family will continue to read my blog. I may never change the design of my site. I also shouldn't hold my breath waiting for my first giveaway. However, knowing that I keep my friend working in London that I miss desperately up-to-date on things; knowing that after my Uncle read a post on my Dad, his brother, it made him cry; and knowing that my son can one day look back and know what a blessing he is to his Mom and Dad is all the reasons why I blog.
This is an original post for New Jersey Moms Blog. To find more reasons why Jennifer K blogs, check out The Kamienski Chronicles.

NJ Moms Blog Retrospect: Why is it children get all the praise when potty training?

2010-07-07T13:05:00.002-04:00

Author's Note: Benjamin had a major set back and didn't pick up the potty training thing again until he turned 3. I don't miss the diapers - at all. Never did get a pottymoon.
Why is it that children get all the praise when potty training?
Why is it that children get all the praise when potty training? New toys are awarded by grandparents for potty prowess. Spontaneous outbursts of cheers can be heard in bathrooms across America when a toddler relieves themselves on the toilet. High fives are handed out like they are going out of style when number two is found in the potty and not in the diaper. Admiration is constantly bestowed on the potty goer but what about the actual trainer? When do I get my share of the praise? When will someone tell me "good job"?
Don't get me wrong. My son is doing a stellar job at this potty-thing, but how do you think he got to be so good? It wasn't like a potty training fairy came down from above and with one wave of her magic toilet bowl brush my child was diaper free. While that fantasy would have been nice, very nice actually, it is just that -- a fantasy. Nor did my son just wake up one day and say, "hey, Mom and Dad these diapers are so pedestrian, so beneath me. Next time, you are at the store pick me up some big boy underwear - I am so over diapers," and with that turned on his heel headed to the bathroom with a copy of War and Peace. No, not that either. How my son got to his mighty throne is from the blood, sweat and tears my husband and I have put in to make him the Potty King. While I am not looking for a shiny, new toy truck for my hard work, I am looking for a little acknowledgment when I am cleaning the poop up from the bathroom floor that has missed the toilet completely. I think I at least deserve a pat on the back after that humbling task.
Thinking about it now. In my opinion, there should be a section in Hallmark dedicated to just this very thing. Never mind congratulating Little Johnny for not peeing on the floor. Big deal! What about, "Congratulations You Taught Your Child How To Aim High!"? After having gone through this and still not having completely finished the mission, I would love to send a friend in the same predicament words of praise and encouragement like, "I realize you are having a hard time with the training, but know that I am here for you in your time of need." Receiving a card like that would at least give me the strength to face another day in the trenches of training. Or what about a card from my son that says, "Thanks for the wipe, Mom. You always make my bottom feel fresh as a daisy."
How about a Pottymoon? There are honeymoons for celebrating a marriage and babymoons for celebrating the upcoming birth of child but what about a celebration for parents who successfully complete potty training? Maybe that is going too far but if you have ever stepped in a puddle of pee on multiple occasions a vacation is what you deserve!
Maybe my dreams of a Hallmark card or Pottymoon will not be realized in this lifetime, but I don't think it is asking too much to give a small kudos, a "way to go" to the Mom or Dad whose kids went on the potty for the first time. Is it? Being a potty trainer is, for the most part, a dirty, thankless job. Even with hours spent on training a little nugget from time-to-time sneaks into my son's underwear leaving me perplexed, angry, frustrated, defeated and just plain exhausted. However, even if I am not being praised or consoled for my efforts, I can take comfort in the fact that diapers will soon be out of my life forever and that beats a million celebrations, congratulations, words of acknowledgment any day of the week (though a shiny new toy for Mommy wouldn't hurt)!
This is an original post for NJ Moms Blog. To hear more potty talk from Jennifer K, visit The Kamienski Chronicles.

NJ Moms Blog Retrospect: The Day I Realized Parent's Don't Live Forever

2010-07-07T13:00:00.000-04:00

Author's Note: I still don't like to think about this subject but who really does?
The Day I Realized Parents Don't Live Forever
When I was a kid, it never even crossed my mind that my parents wouldn't be here one day. Like most, in my childhood days,I saw my parents as invincible, untouchable, protectors of the (and my) universe. My younger-than-most parents would live forever, right?
In my teens, I got my first dose of reality when a friend's mother passed away. Her mother died suddenly one evening of a heart problem. When I attended the wake, I felt as if I was playing a role in movie of the "supportive friend". It seemed to unreal to be real. During that evening, I put on a brave face and held my friend in my lap as she cried but my thoughts weren't about her mother they were about mine. Later that evening as I collapsed into the lap of my Mom, I cried for all that was lost that day. As my mother's arms encircled me, I was confident that my mother would always be there. In my still youthful innocence, I continued to believe in my parents' eternalness.

But, all things most come to an end. Over a year ago, as I attended the funeral of a friend's father, my innocence was finally surrendered. I watched my friend bury her father who was of the same generation as my parents. It hit me. One day, this horrible time would come for me. Morbidly, I thought of what I do and say but more importantly how I could go on without two of my most favorite people in the world. I grieved that day not only for my friend but for innocence lost.
In the past month, I have been reminded of mortality over and over again. From a childhood friend's father dying suddenly to a colleague's mother losing her battle to cancer, I was never more aware until my Dad was diagnosed with a brain aneurysm. Like a hard smack in the face, I had to admit to myself that my otherwise invincible father is mortal -- a hard fact no Daddy's Little Girl wants to acknowledge. As my Dad sat next to me and said, "looks like I am ready for the boneyard." I told him, "we won't let that happen." I know I have no control over fate and destiny, but for that moment, and now as I type it, I believe it. Maybe I am burying my head in the proverbial sand but I need to believe in innocence.
As I look at my son, I am a tad bit jealous and happy at the same time because he has the sheer joy of not knowing the concept of life and death. However, I believe the emotion of fear has crept in. From time to time, he asks me the question, "will you protect me?" and my response is always, "I will protect you forever." I know now that there is no such thing as forever but I have decided, for the time being, to live vicariously through my son and believe that there is a forever.
This is an original post for NJ Moms Blog. You can find more writing by Jennifer at The Kamienski Chronicles.

NJ Moms Retrospect: Childless Vacation

2010-06-28T15:00:00.001-04:00

Author's Note: Looking for another childless vacation and I still don't feel guilty.
May 18, 2009
Should I Feel Guilty For My Childless Vacation?
My name is Jennifer and I enjoyed my childless vacation. This is my story...
For as long as I can remember, I have loved to travel. Whether it be down the Jersey Shore for a lazy week at the beach or exploring the cobblestone streets of Florence, there hasn't been a vacation I've met that I haven't loved. Even the journeys with lots of mishaps and outright mayhem, like getting apprehended in Prague for riding the subway for free (so much for honoring the honor system) and breaking an antique bed in Block Island, have gained me some of my favorite and funniest memories. So when my son Benjamin came into this world, I made my husband promise me we wouldn't stop traveling with or without Ben.
My husband Wally has made good on his promise. In Ben's two short years of life, we've taken him to Maine, North Carolina and the Jersey Shore with little to no trouble. However, when it came time to book a trip to celebrate our 10th Anniversary Wally started to hedge on his promise. Feelings of guilt started to creep in and he suggested that we take a weekend trip to Vermont with our son instead of a romantic rendezvous in Italy. This mom, wife, anniversary celebrator and traveler was not okay with that suggestion. Instead of the joy I find in planning a vacation, I found myself crying big giant tears and asking my husband, "what happened to us? why are you making me feel guilty for wanting to go away alone with my you?"
After my impassioned plea, Wally took me to Vermont without Ben where we rode in a field of freshly fallen snow in a one-horse open sleigh and ate decadent Vermont-made cheeses by candlelight. Before we left Benjamin for his first overnight at his grandparents, I got to feeling "the guilts." Was Wally the better parent because he wanted to bring Benjamin on our romantic getaway? Should I feel guilty for wanting to go away without my son? To be honest, a little bit of me felt like I was a bad mom for leaving my son for the night to have an indulgent weekend with my husband but mostly I felt okay about our decision. Is that wrong?
Flash forward a few months later, Wally suggests we have a proper anniversary trip one that lasts more than a couple days, and without hesitation I say yes. While planning again, I catch myself thinking, "should I feel guilty for wanting to vacation without my son?" But, the guilt isn't present. Even when friends and colleagues give me the standard line when I mention the childless trip, "oh, you're not bringing Ben." Translation: "oh, you're one of those mothers." Maybe that is paranoia or maybe that is actual guilt but my answer is always, "yes and we'll miss him but I can't wait!"
During my six days in paradise, I cried when I left my son (it would be my longest time away from him); I thought about him every single day; I talked about him a lot finding myself saying, "Wally wouldn't Ben just love this? We really need to bring him here"; and I missed him like crazy. However, I also didn't cry the whole time I was away; I didn't think of him every single moment of every single day; I didn't talk about him all the time; and I didn't feel guilty about it. Maybe you think I am selfish or a terrible mom for these things but the person that matters most got a mom back after those six days that was rested and over-the-moon with happiness to see him. Yes, Ben got a better mom in the end and, to me, there is no reason to feel guilty about that. Isn't that what vacationing is about?
This is an original post for New Jersey Moms Blog. You can also find Jennifer writing about other guilty and non-guilty things at The Kamienski Chronicles.

NJ Moms Blog Retrospect: Can I ask Apple, what were you thinking?

2010-06-28T14:57:00.001-04:00

Author's Note: Upon seeing this on the news, I immediately wrote a post. The post was later cross-posted to all our sister sites.
April 23, 2009
Can I Ask Apple, What Were You Thinking?
Dear Apple,
I thought I might have been hallucinating this morning when I was watching the news but low and behold I was not. Some how, some way your company approved (oh yes let me be fair...then pulled) an application for the iPhone that allows you to shake a baby to a virtual death or the "Baby Shaker" app as it is fondly referred to. Even writing this can you believe the colossal mistake you made? Normally, I think you are a pretty alright company - one of the "good guys" if you will - but after this debacle I'm not really sure what to think.
Can you give me a little insight into how this came about? Were you sitting around a room considering new apps and your team started proposing programs like: "Decaying Animal Gallery" and "Run Over Old Ladies' Skills Game." Did you say, "no way how could we ever promote an application that would show dead animals or an opportunity to run over old ladies crossing the street that is completely insensitive and insane, but shaking babies to a death this I LIKE! Tell me more..."

I'm sure someone or some animal thought this was hysterical. Let me tell you if you were wondering - it is not fun or funny it is just plain wrong. I think you got that notion eventually because you did pull the app. But when the proposed shaken baby idea came up you said, "yeah, we got an app for that." Can I provide you with a statistic about shaken baby syndrome? According to the Web site and organization About Shaken Baby Syndrome, more than 1400 cases are reported each year and 1 out of every 4 babies dies of from being violently shaken. As for the other 3 babies in the statistic, they are left with life altering injuries.
Apple, here is my suggestion for a new application, "The Sensitivity Meter." This application judges whether or not someone is being sensitive to other human beings. Might have been a better choice don't you think? You got that?
This is an original post for New Jersey Moms Blog. When not ranting and raving on NJ Moms Blog, Jennifer can also be found writing on The Kamienski Chronicles.

NJ Moms Blog Retrospect: The Real Housewives of New Jersey...Fuggadaboutit

2010-06-28T14:52:00.002-04:00

Author's Note: This post was mentioned in a Star-Ledger article about NJ Moms Blog. Oh yes, the Housewives of NJ are in their second season and Dina has left the show. To me it is unwatchable and I love trashy TV.
April 15, 2009
The Real Housewives of New Jersey...Fuggadaboutit
When I hit my thirties my bed time started to get earlier and earlier, now throw in a 2 year old and demanding PR job, I never get to watch the late shows anymore. However, I made myself and husband to stay up until 11 and watch the sneak peek of The Real Housewives of New Jersey. How could I resist my biggest guilty pleasure - reality TV - combined with my favorite state - NJ? Talk about special occasions! No matter what I had to do that night, this "real housewife of NJ" was watching her some trashy TV. While not disappointed one bit by what looks to be the best Real series yet, I want to make sure anyone living outside of New Jersey gets a few things straight about Garden State Girls.
First, we aren't all Italian. While yes many of us do come claim roots in the boot-shaped country, including myself, we don't all have grandparents we call Nonna and Nonno. In fact, New Jersey is a real melting pot of cultures. On any given day, walking through a town in New Jersey, you can find people with ties to China, India, Russia and yes Italy.

Second, I have never uttered the phrase "fuggadaboutit" in my life until I wrote this post. I even had to google it to see if I was spelling it right. If you watch shows like Sopranos or now Real Housewives of NJ, you would think that it might be a New Jersey baby's first word. Wrong. I actually don't know many people that utter that phrase. Come to think about it - I don't know anyone that says that phrase.
Another point I would like to make about New Jersey Housewives, all of our husbands aren't entrepreneurs in the construction business. Don't get me wrong there are plenty of "entrepreneurs" in our fine state, and yes, I have dated men in this line of business who were very nice. However, I ended up marrying a guy who works at an accounting firm not an owner of a sanitation company.
Some of the women in New Jersey tend to wear their hair bigger than most (not much bigger than TX) and have longer, more bedazzled nails, but there are women here that have straight hair and short nails. There are also housewives who prefer the JCrew look to the Bebe look. While we all don't look or act alike, there is one thing for certain that I think I can say about most REAL housewives of NJ -- we don't really give a shit what people from other states think about us. Big hair or bob - Italian or Polish - accountant or entrepreneur -- whether it be big and brash or gentle and quite, we all have an attitude and love it.
This is an original post for NJ Moms Blog. This real NJ housewife can be found blogging at The Kamienski Chronicles.

NJ Moms Blog Retrospect: Church, Children and Praying for Survival

2010-06-28T14:50:00.000-04:00

Author's Note: While Wally as carrying Benjamin up to communion, Ben said, "hey, Daddy that wasn't so bad."
April 05, 2009
Church, Children and Praying for Survival
Whatever religion you may practice and how ever many times you bring your child to a religious gathering each year, whether it once a year or each week, I think most parents would agree it is not an easy task to undertake. From the "getting ready" part or as it is known in some houses "convincing them to go" part to the actual attending, I sometimes find myself praying for divine intervention at some point during the church going process. However, I don't recall that I was ever a problem for my parents. Maybe they will say something different if asked but I don't think they will since I was the four year old who brought the baby Jesus to the manager at Christmas Eve mass and sat and talked to the priest about my love of God. I was also the teenager who decided to become a lector where I read the scriptures each week to the congregation. I can go on and on but needless to say I was the kid that liked/loved to go to church. I still kind of do but now I have a two year old in tow and that changes the whole experience.
On the other hand, take my brother, his behavior bears more of a resemblance to that of my two year old son Benjamin's attitude towards the church. I can remember each week it being a Battle Royale to get my brother to go to church -- the crying, screaming, stomping, threats and cage match before we got in the car (there wasn't really a cage match but it sometimes felt like it). My most vivid memory was when on Easter Sunday he decided to lock himself in the bathroom at the age of four so he wouldn't have to go. My Father, the world's most tolerant and gentle man, literally busted down the door. The next thing you knew my brother was peeing in his pants. My Mother, of course, yelled out my Dad for scaring her "baby". By the time my family hit the pew, we were all exhausted. He was not only bad getting there but in church I recall him once screaming out during Christmas Eve mass, "MOM when are we leaving for Aunt Lorraine's I want my Tub Time toy!" Yes, my brother turned it up a notch for the holidays.

Now I have a son of my own and I can relate to my Mother more than ever. I am left to wonder how she did it all these years. When my son was a baby, he sat in the carrier like an angel sent from heaven. As he got older, the problems started when he was more mobile. Not only did I need my diaper bag but I needed an arsenal of distracting supplies to keep him occupied. The problems got increasingly worse as he became verbal. One day as we sat in church, my son kept pointing towards the back of the church. It was starting to annoy me because he knew how to speak at this point. I said, "Ben use your words." He used his words alright, "OUTSIDE Mommy! OUTSIDE!" I must have heard "OUTSIDE" about a few more dozen times. My husband leaned over and said to me, "are you happy he used his words?"
Our next big mass disaster came on Christmas Eve. The church was packed to the gills and there was no where or way to really entertain Ben. The outside chant began as soon the homily started. He then started screaming and crying and there was no where to go but outside. I looked at my husband and told him to take him home and just come back to pick me up. I gave up. I just couldn't - I got the knowing faces from all the mothers surrounding me. As the church lights were dimmed and Silent Night began to play, I cried and this time not out of joy but out of exhaustion and defeat. After that, I decided to give God a break for a while.
We started to go back to church again because my parents didn't give up on teaching their kids the importance of church and neither was I! I was pleasantly surprised what a few books and snacks could do to make a kid happy. While we don't make it all the way to the end, it gets better each week. I now leave mass telling Ben what a great boy he was in church. While I know there are set backs, like this week he told me to go to church by myself with Daddy that his Grandma and Poppa would watch him, I believe that every child needs a sense of community in their lives. I'm glad my parents gave it to me and I plan, as much of a battle as it may be, to give that gift to my child. So if you find me praying really hard in mass it might not be for world peace right now but just for peace in my pew.
This is an original post for NJ Moms Blog. You can find Jennifer Kamienski praying for all sorts of things at The Kamienski Chronicles.

NJ Moms Blog Retrospect: A Question of Faith?

2010-06-28T14:45:00.000-04:00

Author's Note: I still believe in a compassionate God.
Stem Cell Research: A Question of Faith?
The ban on stem cell research has been overturned and I am left to ponder what this means. Being someone who is of good standing faith, a catholic who is supposed to believe that this is morally wrong, I'm not so sure I agree with my church. I am also someone who has had embryos frozen and knows that indeed a frozen embryo can give life, a precious child you so desperately want, so I do see the moral dilemma here that many people are struggling with today.
However, let me say, that my church also condemned me for having my child the "way" I did. As I stood in a Newark church, a church that was known for a statue that if prayed at this church by this statue it would help you conceive, I was asked by a priest how I was conceiving this child. I stumbled a bit (and yes lied to a priest) and told him what he wanted to hear so he would give me a special blessing. Because he had doubts of my sincerity, he gave me the speech of how God wants me to conceive a child, and let me say, it wasn't the route I was headed.
On the way home that day from the church in the pouring rain, I cried my eyes out. I was completely torn inside and questioned my moral judgment. I was tortured thinking that if I was able to conceive I would have a child that would be eternally condemned. After days of soul searching, I came to the conclusion one night that I believed in a God that wanted me to have happiness that wanted me to give life whatever way that may be. I didn't believe in a God that because I couldn't have a baby the traditional way I shouldn't have one and I should be left to suffer. My God is a compassionate God.

So here I sit today pondering another moral question, should stem cell research be allowed? Maybe a year ago I might have felt differently but I doubt it. You see, a year ago my father was diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease. My Father's life has changed for ever and everyone around him -- a man so full of life and energy, a man so fiercely independent that a worse disease couldn't have been given to him even if asked. At this time, he is struggling with giving up a little bit of his independence and letting the one's who love him take care of him. I admire my Dad for his strength, courage and wisdom but it breaks my heart to see him so angry and frustrated so often. I also see what it has done to my Mom and see my usually tough as nails Mother be reduced to tears so often too.
As I sat in church on Sunday and listened to all the reasons, why not. I could only think of the reason why - I saw a cure to the pain. I thought of all those frozen embryos that would never give life that would just be discarded and what type of good moral decision is that? I thought if I had one frozen embryo left from all my cycles that I never planned on implanting, I would give it to some brilliant scientist looking for the cure for PD in a heartbeat.
What I came to is this, for me, using a frozen embryo is not destroying life -- it is just the opposite -- it is giving life back to someone. Maybe I am taking the easy way out and bending the rules to suit me? Maybe I am not a good catholic? However, I keep coming back to my belief that my God is a compassionate God. And for me, coming to that conclusion, let's me sleep soundly and gives me hope that we will find a cure to PD and many other diseases giving life back to those who so desperately want it.

NJ Moms Retrospect: Rookie Mistakes

2010-06-28T14:42:00.001-04:00

Author's Note: I continue to make rookie mistakes. I also still consider myself a rookie.
Rookie Mistakes
When I was pregnant, as I sat in the OB/GYN's office, I often found myself reading some sort of parenting or pregnancy magazine. While waiting, I thought I should get a few lessons in on parenting before this child came into the world since I didn't have much of a clue of how to raise a child. A regular feature that struck me in Parents magazine was a column called "It Happened To Me". Basically, it would feature a mishap. Wait, let me rephrase that a HORRIBLE accident caused by a parenting mistake where children often ended up in the emergency room. As I read these stories with horror about falling Christmas stocking hangers that caused a toddler's concussion and infants tumbling off changing tables left with bruises, I thought, smugly, how could that ever happen. I mean I wasn't an expert in this area and self-admitted that the maternal gene might have skipped a generation but come on these parents were obviously not as cautious as I was going to be. In a nutshell, I surmised that I was at least going to be a much better parent then the the ones featured in Parents magazine. Yes, I gave myself the kiss of death.
Think of most professional athletes in their rookie season, they have that swagger like nothing bad is going to happen to me. They believe they are invincible and in many ways they are impervious to the rules of the world. As we all know, having that attitude can be dangerous not only to yourself but to others. While I didn't exactly have a swagger, I did have the attitude that if I was cautious and careful (the two Cs) no "It Happened To Me" accidents would plague my son. However, there comes a time when every rookie makes a mistake. Mine came in the form of Murphy's Oil.

Up until the Murphy's Oil incident, I had free and clear track record when it came to my son Benjamin having accidents in my presence. Not bad if I do say so myself for a child who is almost 2 years of age. Maybe my cockiness got the best of me or maybe it was the fact that I had just called out my Mom and husband for Benjamin having a few incidents on their watches. Whatever it was, my world was about to turn upside down with one misplaced bottle of wood floor cleaner.
In an effort to keep my house clean (I really do need a maid), I decided while Ben was occupying himself I would clean my wood floors. When I turned around to retrieve the mop, I turned to find my son drinking Murphy's Oil. How could I let this happen? I had no idea what would happen next. Would Ben turn blue? Would he stop breathing? Would he start vomiting uncontrollably? What did I do to my precious son? After several phone calls to Poison Control and a visit from the cops and paramedics, I found out that Ben would live. In fact, the worst that would happen to Benjamin is that he might be a little sick.
I now know mistakes, accidents and mishaps are a good way to bring you back to reality and kick that swagger right out of your step. While I confessed to my husband that I had made a colossal mistake on my watch, I knew that I owed a big apology to all the "It Happened To Me" Moms. So here goes...Hi, my name is Jennifer Kamienski and I too am a 'It Happened To Me" Mom.

NJ Moms Retrospect: Multiple Mania and Irresponsible Doctors

2010-06-28T14:39:00.002-04:00

Author's Note: While not my most commented, this is one of my favorites. This still makes me angry.
January 31, 2009
Multiple Mania and Irresponsible Doctors
I am a veteran of the "infertility war". I happen to know way too much about the topic of reproductive endocrinology. Having gone through, years of testing, several surgeries and multiple cycles, I think I have the right and knowledge to comment on the irresponsibility of some fertility doctors. I also have the right because I was fortunate enough to go to two clinics, one a highly-regarded regional facility and the other arguably the best in the world, where the doctors educated their patients on such risks and instituted policies so incidents like the California 8 would not happen.
Trust me I know how you can get caught up in the world of fertility. Your emotions takeover and you think, "sure putting 12 embryos in my uterus is a great idea!", but at that point you aren't thinking of the consequences you are just so desperate to have a baby you will consider anything. However, this is where a responsible doctor needs to step in and counsel their patients. While at "arguably the best fertility clinic in the world," I was told right off the bat even though I had a "difficult case" they would only consider putting two maybe three embryos in at one time. So let's put this into perspective, I am a woman who has not yet had any children - I didn't have the luxury of 6 others waiting at home for me. I am, at the time, 34 years old - not 30. I have stage 4 endometriosis and damaged fallopian tubes, basically I need a miracle, and all the clomid in the world isn't helping me. How does the California 8's doctor in his right mind let this happen when my doctor would only put in up to three embryos?!?!?

I do understand that she didn't go through IVF like I did but when you are on drugs like Clomid, once again, a responsible doctor will monitor follicle production and will cancel a cycle if there are too many being produced to avoid a situation like this. Here is the other thing when you are using a sperm donor you don't necessarily need to be on Clomid. Why in this doctor's right mind did he give a fertility drug to a woman who is clearly fertile?!?
Reproductive medicine has some voodoo and ethical questions constantly surrounding because of negative stories like the CA octuplets and it is unfortunate. At times when I didn't want to hear it, I was blessed to have responsible doctors on my side giving me proper guidance, outlining the risks involved. I read a quote from a doctor saying, "who am I to say how many children a women should have. maybe she wanted a big family?" Maybe she does but P.S. she already HAD ONE! While I know doctors can't tell you what to do and they are not their to judge how many children you should and shouldn't have, they can help you come to a responsible decision one that keeps the mother and unborn children safe. My hope is there are more doctors out there like my wonderfully brilliant and responsible reproductive endocrinologists.

NJ Moms Retrospect: Oh Sugar, Honey, Ice, Tea!

2010-06-28T14:35:00.001-04:00

Author's Note: While I try not to swear around Ben, he does like to say, "for the love of the god" now. Yes, I will try harder...
January 01, 2009
Oh Sugar, Honey, Ice, Tea!
My language has sometimes been described as that of a trucker. Yes, Orbit definitely needs to clean this dirty mouth up from time to time. I have been known to throw my share of f-bombs in inappropriate situations and receive not so-approving looks but F-it I love to swear. Shocking really since I came from a household of curse-free kin. On the other hand, maybe that is why I feel the need to swear so much because I had been repressed all those years from using my favorite four letter words. Now that my son Benjamin has become Polly Parrot I have once again started to watch my language more carefully but every now and then it just escapes from my mouth before I can stop it.
In an effort to work through my problem, I've started to use G-rated phrases like "oh rats" and "darn it" when I am around Benjamin. However, a few weeks back while holiday shopping I fell off the wagon and said "Oh, S.ugar, H.oney, I.ce, T.ea" and I'll give you one guess who repeated my phrase. And of course, my husband Wally was there to witness. I got a lot of, "nice job Jenn" and "oh, and you thought it would be he would learn bad words from." Okay, Wally - yes it was me who f---ed up. You happy? You self-righteous P.I.A.
With the incident a distant memory, I thought the situation was a-one-time-only deal that at least he wasn't repeating it constantly or worse yet repeating it in front of others. Friday my son proved me wrong. Two days before Christmas our furnace exploded and we needed to replace it (Guess what I got for Christmas this year?). The furnace was running fine but as I was preparing dinner on Friday night I heard the sound of water then turned around to see water pouring from a pipe in the kitchen. I screamed for Wally. In each room we went, there was water EVERYWHERE!!! Even in the midst of the mayhem I didn't swear but as I was heading into the basement with Ben in tow to see if my husband needed any assistance with the furnace I saw yet another pipe leaking and said, "oh no!" The next phrase you heard didn't come from Wally but our 22 month old son "Oh, S.ugar, H.oney, I.ce, T.ea!"
We didn't reprimand him for swearing, because as Wally put, "he used it correctly and it was a Oh, S.ugar, H.oney, I.ce, T.ea! moment." Yes, Benjamin I couldn't have said it any better myself.
This is an orginal post for NJ Moms Blog. Jennifer can also be found blogging on The Kamienski Chronicles

NJ Moms Blog Retrospect: Confessions from the bedroom

2010-06-28T14:34:00.002-04:00

An author's note: Benjamin still sleeps in our bed. I hope by the time he is 10 he will be out.
December 17, 2008
Confessions from the bedroom
Now that I have your attention. This post is not about some sexual deviant behavior -- sorry to disappoint. Although, the issue is starting to effect my sex life (Mom, maybe you shouldn't read any further). My confession is: my son sleeps in our bed. A lot of moms our there are probably saying "me too" but my son Benjamin REFUSES to sleep anywhere but in our bed. I mean when we ask him where his bed is he points to my bedroom not his. If I even dare place his precious little head in his crib, he becomes a demon child looking to wish harm on me.
To set the stage, from the time we brought my son home from the hospital, he was never much of a sleeper. However, my husband and I were led to believe by the nursery room nurses that he was an angel -- a model sleeper. I now know those women lied to me. I never was able to tell stories to other moms of how at 2 months my child slept through the night. The only stories I have been able to tell are horror stories of my child's sleeping habits. For the first three months of Ben's life, I kid you not, someone had to hold him at all times. If we even tried to put him in a pack n' play or in his bassinet, no matter how asleep I thought he was, his eyes would flash open, and even as a newborn, he would give me a dirty look. Trust me, I didn't start co-sleeping because I thought it was a great bonding exercise, it was the only way I could get to sleep. Yes, I know how dangerous it is but it seemed to be even more dangerous to have a mother out there with absolutely no sleep. I also knew my child needed to sleep. And the excuses continue....
I always thought, "he'll adjust" or "he'll outgrow this". I also know this to be untrue. I also now believe that he only likes a soft mattress but it is more lies I tell myself to feel better. In the beginning, I tried to get him back to sleep in his crib but each time he would wake up as soon as he was put in the crib. As a working mother, I got lazy and knew it was easier to bring him in my bed with me and my husband. This has proved to be my biggest downfall. If only I was a stronger person who didn't require sleep I could have powered through this, now at 21 months it is too late, my son will be 21 years of age and still in the bed with mom, dad and our dog.
We've tried it all including "ferberizing". Yeah that was a disaster. Once again, I am too weak. The one night we tried this Benjamin first screamed his head off and paced back and forth in the crib like a caged animal. Next to show us how much he was disappointed in us, he actually riped down the video baby monitor and yelled into it -- I'm not exaggerating. I refuse to let my baby cry to the point of sickness. I just breaks my heart so back into mommy and daddy's bed. Another tactic we used was "the crib isn't such a scary place if mommy is in it", yes I crawled in my son's bed but he only wanted out and wanted to leave me there while him and daddy went to the bed.
Now, I just can't take it. I need to do something. The feet in my back and the kicks in the head just aren't cute anymore. I flash forward five years from now and it scares me. Our new strategy is to buy him a big boy bed but I think it will end up being my bed which isn't a bad thought come to think of it now. Hey, and it's more comfortable than the crib (but don't tell Ben I said that).
This is an original post for NJ Moms Blog. You can also find Jennifer blogging on The Kamienski Chronicles.

NJ Moms Blog Retrospect: If A Man Can Get Pregnant So Easily, Why Can't I?

2010-06-28T13:58:00.002-04:00

An author's note: Due to the popularity of this post (my most commmented post), it was reposted to all our sister sites. Just reading over the comments it makes me feel like my words matter.
November 30, 2008
If A Man Can Get Pregnant So Easily, Why Can't I?
Lately, I feel like every time I turn on the news the pregnant man is staring at me. From ABC to CNN, Thomas Beatie was showing off his lovely little girl and announcing that a second child was on the way. While I watched the various interviews, I thought to myself here is a man who is expecting his second child without what seemed to be many fertility issues. From the information I have gathered, the man didn't need to go through any assisted reproductive measures. Yes, the couple used donated sperm but they didn't even need the services of a doctor for the insemination process. In fact, his wife used some sort of bird feeder, at home,to impregnate her husband. I kid you not. A man is expecting child number two because his wife got him pregnant with a device you use to feed a bird.
In my life, I wish the same were true. I wish my husband, Wally, could come along with a bird feeder and make me pregnant but this is not the path I was given in life. Am I bitter towards the pregnant man? A little and not because he is a man but because he seems to be able to get pregnant more easily than me. To get this woman pregnant (meaning me), which supposedly my body was born to do, I need a team of highly paid specialists, hours of mediation, a vegetable-based diet, various yoga positions, many attempts, buckets of money and lots of prayers. While am I blessed to say I was given my miracle after fours years of trying to conceive, I still get a little upset at my non-fertility challenged counterparts. I know it isn't their fault they were given beautiful ovaries (while I was given two rotten eggs) and I should feel happy for them...I should. Don't get me wrong for the most part I do but there is that part of me that is still jealous and can't let it go. But what really drives me up a wall (and I speak for my husband as well when I say this), is the unwanted fertility advice. I know, I know, I know people mean well but for someone who has had yet ANOTHER failed IVF cycle the LAST thing they want to hear is advice on how to get pregnant. So the following is a guide of what not to say to someone who tells you they are having a hard time conceiving.
Never say, "just relax and it will happen." Most women who are suffering from fertility issues have medical problems and all the relaxing, meditating, yoga, wine and vacationing in the world is not going to help them get pregnant. Yes, these things do help you stay sane and do create a hospitable environment for the eggs to grow but it won't change the fact that some has endometriosis, polycystic ovarian syndrome or low ovarian reserve. At a family get together, no less a one year old birthday party, a relative of my husband asked what our hold up was why weren't we having babies yet. Wally kindly explained that we were trying. Wally's relative then told me I needed to "chill out". I had to leave the table for fear of punching him out. Just a warning for people who say those sort of things, if I happened to be in the middle of a cycle and my hormones were raging, I could not have been held responsible for the beating I would have given that man. He was lucky.
Never say, "I know someone who..." Do you really know someone who got pregnant after they adopted a little baby from Cambodia? Do you really know someone who got pregnant even though their tubes were tied? Do you really know someone who after years and years of trying out of blue got pregnant? I don't think you do. It always seems to be someone who knows someone who knows someone. I have never had a first hand account story of fertility hope. Instead, it is always my sister's sister-in-law's cousin twice removed had a child after years of trying by just using Chinese herbs. I am calling it right now -- liar. Here is another little secret, the women who have fertility issues HATE these stories. They are all fine and sweet and wonderful for that mysterious person you don't really know but for the women who have had their hearts broken countless times -- cycle after cycle -- it just breaks their hearts all over again. For the woman who has been told her chances of conception are about 1%, it makes them depressed to know that those stories are just fairy tales. They wish they were real but not for the woman in the story but for them.
Never say, "why don't you try FILL IN THE BLANK HERE?" Unless you have been there done that and it has worked for you don't offer false hope. As a woman who struggled for several years to have a child, I was looking for any miracle cure. I tried it all. Yes, I do believe that a combination of western and eastern medicine is what eventually got me pregnant. I do also know what it felt like one day to stand in the back of my church as a woman with two kids and another on the way told me to try some herbs that a friend of hers used to get pregnant. I had no idea what she was saying all I know is that I wanted to be her. I wanted to be carrying a baby I didn't care what advice she had for me. I also know I couldn't go back to church for awhile after that encounter it made me angry and sad all at once. A place I always felt like I belonged made me feel unwanted like an outcast because I didn't have a baby.
As I think about trying for a second child, I'm not sure I can't put myself through the pain and heartache. I know I will encounter the "when is number two on the way" questions (and have already including on my walk today with my son by a complete stranger) but I will continue to swallow my pride and smile and answer the most tactful way I can, "oh we'll see." And if someone decides to push, I can't be held responsible for what I say next. Remember I warned you.

NJ Moms Blog Retrospect: Honesty May Not Always Be The Best Policy

2010-06-28T13:56:00.001-04:00

An author's note: This post was syndicated nationally
November 18, 2008
Honesty May Not Always Be The Best Policy
It has officially happened. I've started lying to my son, and to boot, manipulating him as well. In the past, I have sat on my moral mountain judging others for telling little white lies to their children. But that was before I became a Mom, and now, well now it is different, I have joined the ranks and become a teller of lies.
My husband Wally first noticed it and pointed it out to me the other night. Benjamin hurt his tooth and we were instructed by the dentist to feed him soft foods. Tired of pasta and soup, Ben wanted something else. I tried to give him some cod but when I asked him to try some "fish" I got a lot of head nodding, and not in the vertical direction but in the horizontal. Desperate for Ben to eat something, I told my innocent, unsuspecting child that the fish was something that he actually enjoyed. I told him the fish was a french fry. Next thing I knew, Ben was enjoying fish and even asking for more. Wally then commented, "are we now lying to our son?" Was I? Were we?
As I contemplated the question, I saw out of the corner of my eye Ben smiling after each bite of his fish -- a 20 month old was actually LOVING fish (or fries as Ben liked to think of them as). I didn't feel like getting into a moral match with my husband so I kept the answer simple and I said yes.
In addition to the french fry lie, I have also appealed to my son's sensitive side. Lately, if he sees that someone is upset or afraid. He will go right up to the person and rub their arm or leg or back (whatever body part is close at the time) and tell them it is "okay" in a soft gentle voice as he puts his head close to you. It is perhaps the sweetest thing I have ever seen and I will admit I have used this beautiful side of my son to get something I wanted done without a lot of the headache. Some may call this manipulation - I call it resourcefulness. As I tried to change his poopy filled diaper, he started yelling "no" and running around the coffee table. This has become a normal occurrence as of late and I am just tired of it. On occasion, I've tried to reason with him, "Mommy doesn't like to change smelly diapers either but who wants to sit in poop - I know I wouldn't." Usually, that approach gets a blank stare or more screams. Other times, I have grabbed him kicking and screaming and this just adds to everyone's frustration. This time around, I covered my face with my hands and started pretend crying. The next thing I knew I heard the pitter patter of little feet and pat on the back and "OK, OK" in the sweet innocent little voice. Yes, I am horrible but he sat very still while I changed his pants with no problem.
So if calling fish fries got him to eat the cod and pretend crying got his diaper changed without the drama, then how wrong could that be? I now believe one little white lie is canceled out by the good it can do for my son and others. I'm sure some parenting expert would tell me how wrong it is but for now I will tell my lies (within reason). I'm sure this will come to bite me in the butt but I'll wait until that happens.

NJ Moms Blog Retrospect: Play Ignorning Dad?

2010-06-28T13:55:00.000-04:00

November 02, 2008
Play Ignoring Dad or Child Ignoring Dad - Which Would It Be?
Ever since the heyday of the Steel Curtain in 1970s, my husband Wally has been a loyal Pittsburgh Steelers football fan. Like most men on a crisp fall Sunday, he can be seen planted in front of the television remote and beer in hand with some sort of Steelers paraphernalia on his body. And like most men, dare you interrupt him during a game. When Direct TV's NFL Ticket was first introduced, my husband realized a new great love in his life. The love that could let him enjoy ever single Steelers game no matter if it is was the nationally televised game or not. When our son Benjamin came along, I hoped that there would be room for another love in his life. I hoped that he wouldn't be the Dad that ignored his child when there was an "important play on".
Truth be told I really don't like those Dads.
I consider them half a Dad but the world is full of them and who knew I might be married to one. I believed Wally would be a Play Ignoring Dad rather than a Child Ignoring Dad but this was THE Steelers not much compared. And from my own personal experience with Wally and the Steelers, I have been known to take a back seat but I hoped, beyond hope, not with Ben.
I had my answer on a recent Sunday afternoon. Benjamin and I had been out and about all day as not to disturb Wally during prime-time Sunday football viewing hours but we came home before the end of the Steelers game. I asked Ben not to bother his Daddy while the football game was on and hang in the kitchen with dear ole' Mom but I guess Ben had his fill of Mom for the day and wanted his Daddy. Before I realized he was gone, he was in the living room wanting Dad's attention. The pivotal moment was upon us. What type of Dad would Wally be?
As I ran from the kitchen and before I could call a timeout, I saw Ben reach his little hand up to Wally's. I whipped my head around to look at the TV to see what was happening with the game, "God please let it be a commercial!" It wasn't. In fact, it was one of those deciding plays -- the plays where unless it is an emergency please don't even think of bothering me. Wally took his hand but was still watching the television for the play to resume. My fears were becoming reality. He was going to be one of "those" Dads. Just as the play was about to unfold, Ben tugged on Wally's arm for him to follow. I said another prayer to God, "please let him be the Play Ignoring Dad!" With a hopeful look in both my eyes and Ben's, Wally got up from his chair with no reluctance and followed Ben, not only into the other room, but out the door. There Wally stayed and played trucks with our son on the deck -- ignoring the end of the game. Making, what I thought, was the best play of Wally's life. In that split second, I confirmed what I already knew, my husband is one of the best.

NJ Moms Blog Retrospect: A Promise

2010-06-28T13:51:00.000-04:00

October 18, 2008
A Promise
My husband, Wally, and I attended the funeral of a friend this weekend. It's the type of experience you never think will happen to you. You have cavalier thoughts before something like this happens that I'm too young to die. I'm way too young to have a friend who has cancer but inevitably it happens and you are smacked back into reality. Being faced with the reality of death often leads you to thinking of many things in your own life.
That day as Wally and I drove to the funeral, we reminisced about Jill and our times with her and her family but we also talked about how our lives would change if one of us died. The one thing I couldn't shake from my mind is how young Jill's children are and how would they remember their Mom. I'm a bit of a cynic and realist by nature and I said the unthinkable in the car that day, "Wally, there is a good chance those children won't remember who their Mom is." It was out there and I said it but what I was really saying was, "Wally, if something happened to me would Benjamin ever really know me?"
To even think that thought, I get a lump in my throat. For the person that dies, the truth is life eventually will go on for their family and friends. It will never, ever be the same but it does go on and that is a good thing -- the right thing. Though, I still wondered how Jill's children will remember her? I say this because I have met children who have lost parents at a young age and as they get older they have vague recollections of their Mom and/or Dad and don't have a real sense of them. Some would argue that is what needs to happen, a possible coping mechanism for the so young and innocent. However, if I was taken from Benjamin's life and someone asked my son "what type of mother I was" or "what was your mom like" and he had little to no answer it would be like losing my life over and over again.
In that car ride when I mentioned this to Wally, he sat and listened and made me a promise. He promised me that it would never happen that Benjamin would always know me. He promised me that my parents, brother and friends would remain close so Ben would know what I meant to each of them. He also promised that whatever life would bring that I would always be Ben's mom and even death couldn't take that away. Having heard those words, I believed it and I believed it for Jill.
It is huge responsibility for those left behind to keep the memory of that person alive. And in my heart, I believe especially for the children. Knowing how much Jill was thought of and loved, I knew Scott, Jill's husband, had made the same promise that he will keep not matter how life changes and goes on.

NJ Moms Blog: The Kamienski Version

2010-06-28T13:37:00.002-04:00

Be prepared to see an influx of posts....
With the demise of SV Moms on the horizon, I need to start copying my NJ Moms Blog posts into my personal blog for prosperity. A programming note: there may be repeats.
Here is my very first post on NJ Moms:
A Stranger Is Watching
A Stranger is Watching is the title of New Jersey resident, Mary Higgins Clark's third best-selling novel about a demented kidnapper. While my story isn't as dramatic, it is the story of one Mother's first time experience of letting a complete stranger watch her only child.
This version takes place while visiting friends in Charlotte, NC but to paint a better picture and to truly tap into my paranoia you need the prologue to this story. First, my husband and I were told while trying to have a child that our chances were slim to none. Thus when we had Benjamin, we believed (and still do) that he was set on this earth for a higher purpose (I know all parents believe this but we REALLY think it is true). Second, Ben is watched by his grandmother while my husband and I at work so we've never had to put him in daycare. Finally, if my husband and I ever want to go out on weekends, we have a plethora of highly qualified friends and family to watch him. All of these points equaling that my 19 month old has not had anyone watch him that I don't know and love until a beautiful Sunday in September.
I started worrying about this dilemma before we even stepped foot unto the plane.
About two weeks before the trip, I mention to my husband Wally, "who is going to watch Benjamin when we go the Panthers football game on Sunday afternoon". Wally didn't have an immediate answer which made me panic. He promised me he would speak to our friends about it. Two days before the trip, I was told that their babysitters would be watching Benjamin. This did not sit well with me. Couldn't our friend's parents watch our precious son? I'm sure they would love to see their grandsons and meet Ben. I wouldn't dare let a stranger watch their kids -- maybe the babysitting thing worked for them but not for this mom. Wally reassured me that everything was going to be okay. How did he know? Didn't he care?!?
I would like to say things got better when we got to Charlotte but it actually got more gut-wrenching for me. Not only was a random group of girls watching my son, but our friends "A-team" was not available but their "C-team" was covering the job. My reassurance was, "she isn't exactly warm and friendly and the kids don't like her much, but she wouldn't let anything happen to them." This wasn't good. I was feeling worse than before. In began to think -- why not leave Benjamin with a rehabilitated convict? Wally tried to calm me but my stomach started to hurt, and thought, this is actually a good thing because I have an excuse now not to go to the game - I was sick.
Wally talked to me about what we would say and what we would do when these girls came but he wasn't telling me not to go through with letting these "not so warm and loving" girls watch our son. I wrote a crazy lady list of things "to do" and "not to do" with Benjamin (most of the list included footnotes) and made sure that my hand writing was legible. The hour was approaching when they would arrive. What should I do? I knew I needed to be brave and trust in my instincts. If I felt that this wasn't right, then I wouldn't go.
When I met the two sitters, I didn't like the fact that the head sitter wouldn't look at me. What was she hiding? I went over the list with them several times and waited for their response. All I got was a head nod. It wasn't looking very good but I knew my dear friend would never let complete wackos watch their kids and mine (the chosen one). So they weren't warm but they are responsible and I gave them a look before I left that said, "if something happens to my only child, you better leave the country and fast." I hugged my son tight with tears in my eyes like it would be the last hug but knew I needed to be brave for him. My son's reaction was one of indifference he had his two new buddies and lots of trucks to play with. Was I the only one who thought this wrong?
Five minutes into our ride I asked to call home and then two other times as well. Wally also asked our friend to call home and each time after our friend said hello the response from the sitter was "there fine". Translation: tell the two nutty overprotective parents their son is still alive. The sitters were right, Benjamin was fine. When I came back, Benjamin was as happy as when I left him - not a scratch to be found and I checked. His diaper was a bit soaked but they swore they changed him (I didn't believe them). While I am not looking for opportunities for Benjamin to be watched by people I have only meet for five minutes, I feel I have overcome a big parenting hurdle and I am proud to come out of it a braver person.
This is an original post to New Jersey Moms Blog.
Update: This was the first and last time a "stranger" has watched Benjamin.

Nature's Calling

2010-05-10T11:19:00.004-04:00

A few weeks ago I went on a business trip to San Francisco and in three days a new habit had formed with my son. In less than 72 hours, under the sole care of my husband, my son went from using the bathroom like a normal human being to using the great outdoors as his new toilet. I know it is very convenient to have a penis, especially, when it comes to "peeing emergencies" but really did we have to teach our son this habit?
Benjamin and I had just come into the house from playing outside in the backyard. We were just about to have a snack when he said, "Mommy I have to go potty." With that comment, he bolted out the backdoor. I ran and followed to find him in the middle of yard pants down urinating on our lawn. After he was finished, I went to find his father and ask him about this "new habit." Wally laughed it off with a "boys will be boys" attitude. I just shook my head and asked if there might be any other habits I should be made aware of that Ben learned/picked up while I was away. He couldn't think of any at the moment. I don't plan on going away anytime soon.

Ummm Ben, That's Not The Pool...

2009-08-20T08:00:00.002-04:00

People it is my world and you are just living in it.

A Dizzying Experience

2009-08-20T07:53:00.007-04:00

Ever since, Benjamin took a ride on the Dizzy Dragons in Point Pleasant he has been obsessed with taking another spin on the nausea inducing ride. I took the first journey with him and I thought it would be best if his Dad had a turn. After the ride, I'm not sure how many more spins on the Dragon this family will take, Ben included.

(The video is sideways to help you experience the sickening feeling)

An Af"fair" To Remember

2009-08-19T06:51:00.010-04:00

If you ever happen to meet my Mom, you might want to ask her about her experience at the Pennsylvania County Fair. She'll probably tell you how we stayed with her sister-in-law's sister and that there was pig slop in the corner of the kitchen and how fly strips hung from random spots on the ceiling. She might even tell you how she got to witness a demolition derby. But the thing she will definitely mention, after telling you her tales of horror, is that the only reason she did and survived her personal hell was because she loved her kids - much of the same reason I do certain things today.

In order to fully take on this parenting role, Wally and I decided to take Benjamin to the Sussex County Fair, not the official "state" fair but after experiencing it first hand I am petitioning for it to be. The day started with a ride on the Busy Bee then onto the Super Slide. Next Benjamin spotted the Dizzy Dragon, which Wally bravely ventured with him on (more about that in a separate post).

Feeling a little dizzy, we next went to watch the goat and sheep judging. There were some fine specimens to choose from that day and Benjamin chose our "Best in Shows". Next we headed to the Holstein tent then on to bunnies and chickens. The smell of food got the group hungry and we started off with some fried pierogies then on to chicken strips (I know weird after seeing live chickens) and french fries. After our grease filled lunch, we headed to what else but the tractor trailer pulling contest!

Not knowing how we could top that, we checked out the equestrian venue then ShopRite's "Little Farm" for kids where I got a sweet tattoo of my favorite client and Ben got to ride a mini-tractor. Finally, we checked out some butterflies, hopped on a real tractor, watched cows being milked, played some games, drove a few Nascars (of course) and finished the day off right with some mini-doughnuts.

Maybe it was the fact that I didn't have to stay on farm, but as opposed to my Mom, I think The Kamienski family will be headed back to the fair next year.

This Way To The Gun Show

2009-08-19T06:49:00.002-04:00

For The Birds

2009-08-19T06:36:00.004-04:00

A few months into my relationship with Wally, we headed down to Atlantic City. The next day happened to be gorgeous so we decided to hit the beach for a little bit before we returned home. During that time, Wally learned of my fear of feathered creatures. As he attempted to feed the seagulls, I got downright angry with him and told him that if he continued to feed the birds I would be leaving the beach.

Flash forward 12 years and now my son is a card carrying member of the Audubon Society. Because I love my son and would do anything for him, I have allowed a bird to build a nest on my front porch and birth a few new birds that might come and peck your eyes out one day. Don't believe me about bird attacks? Google it and you will see for yourself that there is a rise in bird attacks all over the world. Don't say I didn't warn you.

You Are The Reason Why...

2009-08-18T15:32:00.002-04:00

Ever wonder why I blog? Wonder no more. Read my latest post from NJ Moms Blog:
http://www.newjerseymomsblog.com/2009/08/why-i-blog.html

Will Ben Ever Learn Beach Etiquette?

2009-08-18T15:24:00.002-04:00

With summer coming to a close (wah!), I wanted to share my latest posting on NJ Moms Blog about trying to teach Benjamin beach etiquette. Find out how successful I was below:
http://www.newjerseymomsblog.com/2009/08/teaching-beach-etiquette-draft.html

Chronicling Benjamin's Birth Day

2009-08-11T06:54:00.011-04:00

Since I began blogging more than a year after my son was born, I never thought of chronicling his birth until I was given the opportunity to participate in the SV Moms Book Club. This month, we read a book by Mark Sloan, M.D. titled Birth Day, a book which "explores the wonder of childbirth". So what better time than now to explore the wonder of my son's birth and what a wonder it was...

A day I thought would never arrive did on a snowy Monday morning in February. I was at that point when you are just OVER being pregnant. At an appointment earlier the week before, I had explained this "feeling" to my obstetrician, Dr. Yeum, and she suggested I meet with her partner Dr. Pittman, also fondly known as "Pitocin Fingers." Note: I would not think of her fondly during my exam. That Monday morning, as the snow continued to fall, my husband Wally and I took separate cars to the doctor's office to see if we could "get things going." The plan was to have Wally there for moral support and a hand to squeeze really hard if the exam got too intense, then for us to go our separate ways off to work. Well, that was the plan.

I won't get into the gory details of the exam. Needless to say, when the exam was over my belly was visibly contracting and Dr. Pittman had earned her nickname. I was then put on a monitor for about 10 minutes. When Dr. Pittman returned, she said, "okay this is it. I will see you at the hospital." She might as well said to my husband and I, "okay this is it. I will see you at the planet Mars." We couldn't process "this was it." My next response, after we picked our jaws up off the floor, was, "so, we'll go home and wait, right?" It was then her turn to look at us like we were speaking in foreign tongues, "no you need to go the hospital." It was now my husband, Wally's turn, "ok so we will get our bags and wait for the contractions to get intense and get to the hospital - probably later today, right?" The frustration started to build on Dr. Pittman's face, "no, guys you need to go to the hospital now." Me, "can we at least get our bags?" Dr. Pittman, "how far are you guys away?" Me, "only Morristown." Dr. Pittman knowing I can't fathom going to the hospital at this very moment says very kindly, "go home and then go directly to the hospital - no waiting around - get there as soon as possible."

Still not understanding the full magnitude of what was happening, we go out to the parking lot and realize, "oh shit, we have two cars." Wally turns to me and says, "do you think you can drive?" Keep in mind my contractions are 7 minutes apart and there is snow falling pretty heavily on the ground, my response, "sure." Wally assures me he will stay on the phone with me and will follow close behind. Yes, I am the woman who drives during labor, during a snowstorm! I think I need to get a medal or something for surviving that feat. No medal yet.

We make it home safely and I decide there is no need to rush. I take another shower. Wally takes another shower. I do my hair and makeup. I check to make sure I have everything. Of course, I have about four armfuls of things we are bringing with us to the hospital. We make a few phone calls. We kiss our pooch goodbye and head back to the hospital. We don't arrive until after 12 pm. If Dr. Pittman was at home with us she would have only allowed us to grab our bags and leave but I thought, "I've had worse cramps than this. This baby is not ready to make an entrance just yet."

We arrive and check into the PET unit where I get hooked up yet again. At around 2 pm, I get a message from Dr. Yeum saying they are ready to check me into the L&D and that they are going to start a small Potocin drip. To be honest, I thought I was going to be sent home as a "false alarm," but it seemed this was REALLY happening.

Then the crowds started to arrive, first my parents then my best friend and her husband, my mother-in-law then finally my brother (with a life-size giraffe for his new niece or nephew). All were gathered at the hospital before 5 pm that day. What I remember most from their visits in and out of the room was my Dad's sheer amazement of how good I was doing. He commented to my Mom several times that day, "I can't believe how great Jennifer is doing. She doesn't seem to be in any pain." To be honest Dad, you and me both. I too was amazed and not sure why, but I really wasn't in a lot of pain. Me, the girl who faints at the thought of pain was actually being tough as nails. By 6 pm still no epidural and only dilated about 2 cms my nurse convinced me to get the epidural. While she knew I wasn't in any horrible pain, she explained that it would relax me and hopefully get this show on the road.

Up until this point, things are going pretty smoothly. Enter the anesthesiologist's PA. I am handed a bunch of legal mumbo, jumbo to review and sign. Having to prepare to receive the biggest needle of my life (did I mention I have a needle phobia), I hand the papers to my husband who proceeds to look over. He asks the PA, very nicely I might add, why he cannot be present in the room during the epidural. Her answer, "germs." Wally, "germs? really? that doesn't seem to be a good enough reason considering people have been in and out of this room all day doing God only knows what to my wife." She then quips, "what are you a lawyer?" Not sure what happened after that I just know that my husband was trying to remain as calm as possible for me. Wally then decides to take up this argument with the doctor. The doctor tells him that we need to focus on the patient that this is a very delicate procedure, blah, blah, blah. Now, I appreciate the valiant efforts of my husband knowing how afraid I am of this GIANT needle, however, the doctor has now refused to do the procedure unless my husband and mother leave the room. I look at Wally and I say to him very calmly, "I appreciate what you are trying to do here but get out of the room now so I can get this thing over with." He then tells the PA, doctor and nurse that he is only going to stand right outside the door that if something happens he is coming back in. Everyone is fine with this and I get my epidural. To get the bitch PA back for her rude comment to my husband, I squeeze her with all my might during the procedure hoping she gets some nice black-and-blues on her arms.

Things start to really move now! They break my water (some random dude - still hoping he was a legit doctor) and I go from 2 to 8 in record time. Dr. Yeum is called and the nurse starts preparing the room for the arrival of Baby Kamienski. But instead of pushing out my child at 8 or 9 that night, I stall. At 11 pm, Dr. Yeum comes in and says I am going to give you another 15 minutes but that's it somethign about swelling and the position of the baby. With fingers crossed, I get one last exam and then the OR is booked. No pushing for me. I cry to Wally and my Mom who tell me how proud they are of me. My Mom tells me who cares how this baby comes into the world? I did, but in the end it doesn't really matter now does it? Before I head into the OR, I ask my Mom and best friend for a brush and mirror. They indulge me knowing full well that I am going to be putting a cap on to cover all my hair but they don't say a word. As I am wheeled into the OR, I get last words of love and praise from my parents, mother-in-law, brother and best friend and husband.

As I am being prepped, my friendly PA returns looking right over my head. Then it happens, "ummm, Wally I feel that?' Friendly PA, "you don't feel anything." Me, "ummm, I do feel something." Dr Yeum now peers over the curtain to look at me, "what's wrong? what is it?" Me, "Dr. Yeum I felt it when you started to cut me." The PA is about to talk back to me when Dr. Yeum shoots her a look and tells her boss to turn it up NOW. Dr. Yeum waits a little while and then proceeds. If we are being honest here, it sucked. I hated the feeling of being awake under the knife and to say "you are going to feel some minor tugging" is putting it mildly.

At 12:19 am on February 27, a shout rang out in the operating room announcing, "It's a boy!" Up until this point, I had no idea of the gender of this life growing inside of me nor did I know how awe-inspiring he would turn out to be nor did I even know his name just yet, all I knew at that very moment is that my miracle had finally arrived. After trying for almost 4 years and waiting another 9 months for Baby Kamienski, all our dreams had come true in in the middle of the night. The wonder of it all...

Our Adventure At Sea (I Mean Lake)

2009-08-05T07:10:00.004-04:00

Saturday happened to be one of the best days of summer. We decided to take advantage of the beautiful weather and do something we haven't done since I was pregnant with Benjamin. Wally and I both agreed it was time to dust off the ole' kayak and take Benjamin for his maiden voyage.

A little apprehensive, for fear of the entire crew falling in the lake, we set out on our journey but not before a life vest for Ben was purchased and picture-perfect picnic was packed. We headed to Split Rock Reservoir , a dream of a lake right smack in the middle of Boonton Township. Not easy to find, there are absolutely no signs pointing the way to the destination which I believe is done on purpose like a well-kept secret. However, we happen to know one of Jersey's finest fishermen, my father-in-law, and he was able to point us in the right direction.

The lot was near capacity when we arrived (it is also the only parking lot/boat launch on the reservoir). We decided it would be best to dump all the gear near the path to the lake and then park the car. Of course, I got a little spastic and somehow injured my shoulder before the paddling even started but I swore to myself that I was going to be a trooper.

Now before we get to the kayaking part, let me paint of picture of what needed to be accomplished to get into the lake. We had to lug a 100 and something pound two-person, I mean three-person now, kayak down a rocky hill with a picnic basket, cooler, paddles, life jackets and two-year old in tow. I have to say Benjamin listened to every word we said that day and was extremely well-behaved (thank you God). Ben held onto his Daddy's hand as we navigated down the incline. When we got the bottom of the hill, we asked Benjamin to stand to the side and "not move a muscle." He agreed, "Mommy I won't move a muscle." Once again another thank God - this time for the kindness of strangers. As we scratched our heads trying to figure out how we were going to get everyone in the kayak without tipping it over before we even started, a nice man helped us steady the boat as we loaded in. And off we went...

Benjamin was thrilled to be in the boat. Well, at least that's what Wally said, since I was in the front and the two boys were in the back and I wasn't turning around for fear of tipping. I could hear him though as he started pointing out all the various sights.

We paddled around the lake looking for an uninhabited, smooth spot to dock and have our picnic lunch. Heading straight across the lake, we found a lovely cove to picnic. Upon exiting the boat, I almost stepped on a frog which Ben still thinks is funny. In fact, he placed a plastic frog between my toes the other day to amuse himself. Once we were all safely out of the boat, I unpacked the lunch and spread out the tablecloth on a smooth rock. Not sure how Benjamin would be with a sandwich, shockingly he hasn't really had many, he ate his hummus and cheese like a sandwich eating pro. He also enjoyed some chips and other snacks. As a treat for my newly promoted husband (yipee Wally!), I made him a special snack of deviled eggs which got a little tossed around but were still delicious nonetheless. While eating, I threw bread in the water to show Ben the fishes who came close to the surface to grab their own lunch.

After picnicking with the dragonflies and a run in with a spider, we headed into the water. Wally first took Benjamin out into the water but he pleaded with his Dad to go by me since I was in a more shallow area and closer to shore. Together Benjamin and I sat on a rock in the water and watched Wally swim. Daddy even swam under water for us which thrilled Ben to no end, "do it again Daddy!" After getting over his initial fear, Ben got brave enough to swim between his Dad and me! Go Ben!

Before heading back, we paddled some more checking out a few other spots on the water. Not realizing how far we had actually went, we came a bit confused as to where the boat launch was located (again no signs). We eventually found our way back and proud to say without a tipping incident. As we sat in the car, exhausted, sweaty, sore and wet, I knew this would be a memory we could all treasure forever.

Will It Get This Bad?

2009-08-02T07:50:00.004-04:00

As Wally held Benjamin's hand down the stairs of our deck headed to our car, Ben heard the church bells ringing and said, "I'm not going to church." Wally failed to tell me this until after the service was over. When we pulled up to church, from the backseat we heard, "I'm not getting out!" He started banging on the car window and repeating the mantra, "I'm not going to church." We finally got him into church where he was good for the most part except when he told me I wasn't his mother and that he didn't want to see me. Apparently, I am the bad guy.

When I saw the following report on the news, at first, I was comforted thinking "not my kid" which quickly turned into fear as thoughts turned to, "will it get this bad?":
http://www.examiner.com/x-2812-Road--Driver-Examiner~y2009m7d30-Video-7yearold-steals-car-to-skip-church
Is this what we have to look forward to?

I Don't Want To Say I Told You So, But....

2009-07-26T09:07:00.005-04:00

A friend asked me on Friday, "Jenn how was Sesame Place?" I told her to wait for the blog post, so here it is...

On Wednesday, I called my Mom to voice my concern over the weather. During that time, we got into a "heated" discussion on whether or not to cancel the trip. My Mom accused me of not wanting to go and I just decided to let it go. And so, reservations were made and plans to meet in the morning were arranged.

There comes a time in life when the words, "I told you so" are very appropriate -- this is one of those times. When I woke up that morning, it wasn't very promising. It seemed the sun had decided not to rise. As we traveled down to Langhorne, PA, it started to get darker and darker and darker and the words "I told you so" danced on my lips. About a half hour outside of the theme park, the heavens opened up and the rain came down in buckets. Finally arriving at about 11:30 am or so, we saw legions of sopping wet parents and their children heading for the exits. However our group wasn't going to give up so easily. My Mother, now known as Al Roker Jr., and I headed to the entrance to see "what the situation was." After standing there for about 10 minutes, we were told it was declared a rainy day and were refunded our money. The rainy day policy didn't sit well with the 2 and 3 year olds so elaborate tales of Big Bird catching the swine flu were told.

Almost 2 hours from home, now what? What a silly question! You sit in a Burger King for over 2 hours while the kids play then you head back in the pouring rain and sit in traffic on the turnpike and return home at 5pm having accomplished nothing but a lot of sore butts from sitting in the car so long. Here is the even crazier thing! We all plan to try it again in a few weeks. Glutton for punishment yes. The thrill of being able to tell my Mother, "I told you so!" - priceless and worth the aggravation :).

Baby Crazy!

2009-07-26T08:46:00.010-04:00

Before anyone gets too excited, when I titled the blog post "Baby Crazy," I was not referring to me but Benjamin. My son LOVES babies! Seriously, can't get enough of them. If a baby is in a room, he needs to be near that baby. He loves to kiss babies, tickle babies, look at babies, rub babies' heads (very gently) - you name it Benjamin wants to be part of the baby action.

Take for example the picture above with a few of Benjamin's third cousins, Ben had to be next to Baby Chloe for the picture. Not the twins who are more his age. Nope the baby of course! If it was a choice between a room of toddlers and a room of babies, Ben would always choose the babies. He is also fiercely protective of these little ones. When we were at a party, he was playing with Baby Nicholas and the baby's Dad who he hadn't seen up until that point takes the baby from his wife. Benjamin went right up to Baby Nick's Dad and said, "give that baby back to his Mommy!" Everyone in the room laughed except Ben who was adamant that the baby be returned promptly to his Mom.

As I look at Benjamin and see how much love he has to give, it gets me to thinking. Is a number two in our future? Only time will tell.

Favorites

2009-07-26T08:41:00.002-04:00

Lately Benjamin seems to be hit or miss when it comes to eating, but the other day it was a hit! As he spooned the corn, mac n' cheese and london broil into his mouth, he turned to me and said, "Mmmm! Mmmm! My favorite!"

Potty Talk

2009-07-24T12:56:00.002-04:00

I am tired of potty training and even more tired of Benjamin getting all the kudos. Here is my most recent post on NJ Moms Blog for your viewing pleasure:
http://www.newjerseymomsblog.com/2009/07/why-is-it-that-children-get-all-the-praise-when-potty-training.html

More Tails From The Toilet

2009-07-24T12:33:00.004-04:00

If you have come in contact with me in the last few weeks, you have probably heard this story but I love it so much I need to preserve it:
Benjamin has been having a problem controlling his aim while peeing (nothing new in the boy category or the male category for that matter). So to help address this problem, I have been encouraging him to "point your penis down." This has seemed to help keep the urine in the bowl rather than all over my floor.
The other day he came over to me and said, "can I teach Shorty (his stuffed monkey-get your minds out of the gutter) how to go to the bathroom?" I said, "sure!" Next thing you know Ben is propping Shorty on the toddler potty. As Shorty is sitting there Benjamin gives him this instruction, "now Shorty point your penis down." Just for the record, Shorty didn't make any mess. Good training Ben!
Later that same day, Ben bursts in while I am going to the potty (I have no more privacy in my life). He decides he too wants to join me. While he sits on his throne, he asks me, "Mommy is your penis pointed down?" I then need to explain to a 2 year old (I thought this conversation would take a few more years like 20) that "mommies" don't have penises. In quick response to this revelation, Benjamin asks, "but you do have shorts and shoes like me." Yes, yes, I do.

Four Ben Stories

2009-06-29T15:00:00.003-04:00

Here are some recent musings from the world of Benjamin:

Benjamin isn't the world's most proper dinner companion but Wally and I are working very hard on changing this situation. In fact, recently, we sent him to his room and ordered him not to come out until he was ready to finish his supper. About five minutes later, he was calling for Wally at the edge of the steps. Wally went to the foot of the staircase and asked, "are you ready to come down?" He said that he was ready. Wally then asked if he was ready to finish his dinner. Benjamin then said, "no, I will stay in my room." With that statement, Ben turned around headed back to his room and slammed the door. So much for standing our ground.

Let me take you back to the dinner table but another night when Benjamin was being agreeable. We were having Chinese and he was enjoying his Lo Mein immensely. At the time, I was dipping an egg roll into duck sauce. He asked me, "what is that." I told him duck sauce. He made a face and I told him to try it. Wally then compared it to a dipping sauce like ketchup. Ben then agreed to try it. Cautiously, he took the Chinese noodle in his hand and stuck his tongue out ever so gently and dabbed it on the noodle. With a contorted face, and Mom expecting the often heard "I don't like", he said, "I like it. Maybe I can put it on a chicken nugget?" Note to self: get more duck sauce.

When watching Ben enjoying riding Lightening McQueen in our backyard, my Mom decided she wanted an electric ride-on toy for by her house. My brother, Uncle John, agreed to get this for Benjamin to play with while at Grandma's and Poppa's house. Last week, they all went to the toy store to pick out a new toy. As my brother and mother tried to sway him towards the Jeep, Benjamin caught site of a Cadillac. He asked Uncle John to bring it down so he could get a more thorough inspection of the Escalade. As Uncle John brought it to the floor, Ben began to hug the car and said, "Uncle John I don't want a Jeep. I want a Cadillac! You get this for me?" Oh my young son, I have taught you well. A Cadillac with a real working radio is much better than a Jeep any day of the week.

My Mom just told me this story. Benjamin and Grandma went to the zoo where a peacock proceeded to follow Ben out to the parking lot as they were leaving. Benjamin turned to my Mom and said, "Grandma the peacock wants to come home with me. Can we bring him home?" My Mom said, "Ben I would have to call your parents and ask." I didn't get a call but unfortunately the answer is no Ben --- Bruin wouldn't be okay with it and he has the veto power when bringing any new animals into the house.

Taking A Back Seat

2009-06-21T06:59:00.005-04:00

While I was pregnant, my brother said to me, "do you know what you are doing here?" I wasn't sure what he meant. He went on to explain that by having a child and bringing my parents the long-awaited grandchild we (my brother and myself) would soon be taking the back seat in our parents' lives. My brother especially noted this theory with our Dad. At the time, it was something I never really considered and knowing the relationship I had with my Dad I thought that wouldn't be possible. Enter Benjamin Joseph Kamienski, the boy who made my Dad a Poppa.

Since I was the one that stole my Dad's heart from my Mom, I guess it is only fair that my son be the one to steal my Dad's heart from me. When we (my Dad and me) are teaming up against my Mom, she can often be heard telling the story of how on the day I was brought home my Dad left her in the rain and tended to me first. Yes, there was a new boss in town. However, just like my Mom I didn't mind taking a back seat.

You see my Dad has a very rare gift. He has the rare gift of loving someone completely, forever. Even when you aren't in his presence, you can feel his love. My Dad worked a lot when I was growing up but I never, not even for a moment, didn't know I was surrounded by my Dad's love. While he wasn't present for every little bit in my life, he was there when it mattered the most and he wasn't half there he was whole there. He was the one person that cheered the loudest when I performed on stage for all those year's of my life. He was the one that hugged me the hardest and longest the day I graduated college.

So you see, it doesn't matter that my status has been downgraded. I have selfishly had my Dad's love for so many years that is only fair that this great gift be shared with my son. Because before it was all about the happiness I felt from my Dad's love to me, now it is about the happiness I feel when I see the joy that Benjamin brings to my Dad. I never really knew how I could ever repay my Dad for all that he has given to me. Now I realize how simple it really is.

My Dad has told my Mom, how he didn't think his heart could love anymore than it did before Benjamin came into his life. I did. I know my Dad's heart inside and out and it is the biggest heart I know. Happy Father's Day Dad -- loving the view from the back seat.

Bringing Joy Into Our Lives

2009-06-21T06:31:00.009-04:00

It may sound cliche but one of the main reasons I fell in love with Wally is that he makes me laugh. If you are looking to have fun, there is no better person on earth (in my humble opinion) to have a good time with than my husband. And it is this reason (and yes many others), that I love the type of Dad Wally is to Benjamin.

While I am the uptight, "don't do that Benjamin" parent, Wally is laid back soul that brings laughter into Benjamin's life. When I am in another part of the house and I hear their chuckles through the hallways, it puts the biggest smile on my face. Wally has helped make Benjamin a lovable kid -- the best (once again in my humble opinion). It gives me my greatest joy when someone approaches me to tell me, "boy your son is just such a happy kid." When I hear that, I have no further to look than my husband.

As a Dad to Benjamin, Wally shows Benjamin all the joy that life can bring. Even in the mundane like taking a bath, Wally makes Benjamin's days an adventure worth having. Like the other day, I sat back while all 6'5" of Wally hunched over to push Benjamin in a Tonka dump truck in circles, at top speeds, around our yard. Squeals of laughter could be heard from down the block. Benjamin demanded more and more and more. And Wally didn't stop, he just kept on pushing with the biggest grin on his face. And that my friends is the type of Dad Wally is and always will be - he's the guy that won't stop pushing the Tonka truck no matter how bad his back feels because it makes his son happy.

Thank you for bringing the laughter into this family's life. I am blessed to call you the father of our son. How did I get so lucky?

YUCK! Mud! What's A Girly Mom To Do?

2009-06-11T16:48:00.004-04:00

I love my son more than life itself. I would do anything for him. And yes, I would stand in front of moving bus to save his life without hesitation. However, I don't like mud. You can throw in the dry stuff too - dirt - I don't like that much either. The problem is Benjamin LOVES dirt and mud. If I let him, he would spend all day with a few trucks and a pile of dirt. I try to discourage this practice as much as I can but I can't keep the child away from his passion.

While most thought I was better suited to raise a girl, my now amateur palaeontologist and construction connoisseur status have changed many a mind. Instead of playing with Barbies and having tea parties, my days are spent reading books about bugs and watching Disney's Cars. I love all things boy but I can't get over the dirt thing. Why the obsession with dirt boys?

Don't get me wrong I get right in there and play in the pile of yuck, but not as much as I get into playing with toys that are clean like plastic gorillas and plush dogs.

Why do I hate dirt? Here are my top reasons:

Dirt under the nails (impossible to remove from a 2 year old's fingernails)
Dirty toys (that Benjamin then insists on bringing in the house that I have to clean in the tub that also gets dirty)
Dirty clothes/shoes (not only his but mine - so many clothes/shoes ruined - I hate dirty shoelaces)
Dirty dog (eventually Bruin gets in on the act and inevitable the dirt ends up in our bed)
Dirty floors (the absolute worst - it seems I am cleaning the floors every single day - reason #54 why Jennifer needs a maid)

Why do I tolerate this? Why do I live with the dirt? The dirty truth is that I can't resist that face (even when it is full of dirt)!

The End Of Innocence (originally posted on NJ Moms Blog)

2009-06-11T16:45:00.004-04:00

I recently tackled a tough topic for me about the mortality of parents:

http://www.newjerseymomsblog.com/2009/06/the-day-you-realize-parents-wont-live-forever.html

Do you remember the moment when you realized your parents wouldn't live forever?

Number 2 is #1

2009-06-06T08:07:00.005-04:00

This past Wednesday, Benjamin reached a milestone event in his life. He went on the potty all by himself. The past 2 months or so, we have observed Ben as he would quietly walk into the next room after dinner or stand silently near his train table shortly after breakfast. While we knew what he was upto and would ask him if he wanted to go on the potty, his response would almost always be "Don't see me, Daddy" or "Don't see me, Baba". When asking him if he wanted to use the potty, we would always get a big "Noooooo!". All that changed this week.

Having spent the day with Ben while working from home and having some extra work to catch up on, it was boys-night-only as Jenn was over by her parents wishing Uncle Bill farewell on his return to California. When I spied Ben casually walking into the dining room, I asked him where he was going. He said "Don't see me, Dad" so I countered with "Would you like to go on the potty?". To my stunned amazement, he said yes. But there were conditions. "Can I bring my trucks with me? he asked. I said of course you bring your bring your trucks and helped him gather 4 small-sized, yellow Tonka bulldozer, pay loader, dump truck and digger, I recall.

By the way, the reason I also say "Of course"to his any requests nowadays is to simply hear his parroting return "Of couusse" which sounds so sweet that I love just to hear it everytime. But that's another story.

Back to the matter at hand. Ben, holding his four trucks in his tiny lap and hands, was removed of his shorts and 'diapy' and seated on the mini-Diego throne which is situated in the near corner of the downstairs bath between the tub and inside wall. "Don't see me, Dad" was instructed and I obeyed by leaving the washroom, closing the door and letting our little man have some quality time.

I could him talking to his trucks and then minutes later, bowled out the door and exclaimed "I did it!" The evidence was clear and undeniable. He did it. I was proud as a Dad could be. Since then, he has done it again each night and we are on way to Pull ups and big boy underwear. Way to go, Ben! Number 2 is #1.

It's Back...Four Ben Stories

2009-06-06T06:31:00.004-04:00

After a short hiatus, every one's favorite storytime is back (or at least that's what people tell me):

Friday I had to work from home. To occupy Ben's time while I went through my emails, I put on a Max & Ruby DVD. About 10 minutes into the cartoon and checking emails, Ben came into the office. I asked him, "don't you want to watch Max & Ruby?" He looked at me and said, "no, I want to watch you." Note to my boss: Not sure how much work I can get done after that statement.

To add a little ambiance to the evening, Wally played some music outside while we ate dinner. After dinner was over, Benjamin wanted to get his groove thing on and started to dance in circles. I asked him to, "shake his moneymaker!" I then showed him how to shake it and not break it. He thought this was the best thing in the world and couldn't stop asking others to join in his dance party including Bruin (who he felt didn't get the concept). In the car the other day while listening to Usher, I asked him to shake his moneymaker. He said, "I don't want to shake my moneymaker." He then looked out the window and wouldn't talk to me the rest of the car ride. I guess you can't force the moneymaker.

Benjamin and I were getting ready to head out on a walk. When we got the driveway, I noticed a pile of scraps (wood shavings, paper, twigs, etc.) the birds had created underneath the basketball hoop. Ben turned to me and said, "what a mess! get the vacuum Ba Ba."

As Benjamin is getting older, I like to introduce new words into his vocabulary and with his excellent pronunciation (I didn't say it two speech pathologists did) I tend to push the limits. This time it was the word "pharmacy". I told Ben how we were going to the pharmacy to pick up cream for the rash on his arms. After picking up the cream and going about our day, later that night when I put the medicine on he said to me, "Mommy, we got the cream at the pharmacy." Maybe I should have introduced him to the word hydrocortisone, as well?

A Memory Like An Elephant

2009-05-28T14:21:00.003-04:00

Much to my chagrin I don't get to see my best friend as often as I would like. And it seems even rarer these days to get both families together, but we were fortunate enough to have one of those rare, wonderful get togethers over the Memorial Day weekend.

When I told Benjamin we were seeing Aunt Kristi, Uncle Mike and Michael. He looked at me and said, "I can't see Uncle Mike. He is on the boat." I had to think a minute and attempt to figure out what he meant by this statement. Not having much a memory these days, I then recalled that when Aunt Kristi did happen to come by a couple weeks back and asked where Uncle Mike and Michael were we told him on a submarine. Obviously having a better memory than I do these days, he recalled me telling him about the sub. Having been reminded by my 2 year old, I told him, "don't worry Uncle Mike and Michael are off the boat. You'll see them tonight."

I'm not sure he believed me but when he saw the two Mikes walk into the restaurant he was excited that they were finally off the boat!

However, I realized that my child now has quite a memory and not much is going to slip past him. Another example, when I showed him yesterday a car's "Cars," and said "oh you don't have this one," (keep in mind he has about 100 different ones) he told me "yes I do! it is at Grandma's." Guess what? He was right. The ole' "pretending it didn't happen" tool might not work that well these days. I believe a new parenting tool will have to applied here. Any suggestions?

Happy Anniversary The Kamienski Chronicles!

2009-05-28T14:11:00.006-04:00

A year ago today, I wrote my first blog post. I hope The Kamienski Chronicles has brought you as much pleasure as it has brought me. Thank you for continuing to read about my family's adventures. Stay tuned for more!

A Few Reasons Why My Mother's Day Was Perfect (yes, I know it was about a month ago)

2009-05-19T08:13:00.007-04:00

After talking with a few friends, I realized how perfect my Mother's Day was thanks to my husband. On Mother's Day, we did exactly what I wanted no questions asked. I was given the chance to take a long shower (my personal heaven on earth). I was greeted with a "Happy Mother's Day," by Benjamin (and a beautiful card, gorgeous flowers and a very special gift). I received lots of hugs and kisses from my son (something he is sometimes stingy with). I went to church with my Mom and had brunch with my entire family (I had cheese and sweets and fries and didn't care). I even got to sit on the couch while Wally put Benjamin to bed (ahhh). Thank you Wally for giving me a Mother's Day that makes me smile every time I think of it. It was a day that I did nothing but enjoy my son and the life we created.

Mom's Say The Darnedest Things

2009-05-19T08:09:00.003-04:00

At my friend Karen's baby shower (congrats to Karen, Jared and soon-to-arrive baby Blaire!), Denise, another friend and fellow mother said, "Look at all these women rushing home to their families. What's wrong with them?" With that, we continued to sit there and drink our glasses of wine. Cheers Denise!

The Big Boy Bed Has Arrived And Life Is A Dream

2009-05-19T07:41:00.005-04:00

Let me start off by saying I am typing this post at 7:44 am and Benjamin is still sleeping in HIS bed! Thank you big boy bed I knew you were a godsend. People who don't know my son can't truly appreciate what an absolute miracle the statement above is to me. To shed a little light, my son refused to sleep in a bassinet, pack n' play or crib for most of his baby year. As soon as that little precious head would hit a foreign flat surface, he would immediately wake up. Wally and tried every sleep method but the place he was most comfortable was in our bed. Yes, I know how dangerous this potential is/was but the child outright refused to sleep. Imagine three straight nights of the Ferber Method where on the last night my son actually ripped his baby monitor down and started screaming directly into it with a look of fury in his eyes. He paced back and forth in his crib like a crazed, caged animal. I was scared of him at that moment and I as weak so back in the bed. We've had our little triumphs here and there but when Benjamin could actually begin to verbalize his feelings he told me, "I don't like my crib." Yeah kid, tell me something this Mom doesn't know.

So at the rip old age of two, Wally and I decided that it would be best if we started looking into a big boy bed for Benjamin. After much searching, we settled on a full size bed* for our pint size insomniac. Why a full size bed? Considering I am taller than the average woman, Wally is 6'5" and Ben is 88 percentile of height, a twin might not cut it by the time he is ten. Oh and there was one more reason, I guessed there would be a few nights I would spend in bed with Ben and I wanted some extra room. Selfish maybe. Smart yes.

It wasn't easy getting the bed. Pottery Barn cancelled the order with a random, nonchalant message. An hour long phone call later, Ben had the exact bed Wally and I wanted in the color we originally wanted for the price we wanted (and a gift certificate for $50 for Ben for all his pain and suffering).

Enter the age of the big boy bed! When Wally and I would be away the bed was set to arrive, so we had to get rid of the crib the night before we left for vacation (Wally was not happy with me that evening). While sitting on the plane getting ready for takeoff, Wally and I get a call from home. Benjamin was demanding to know where his crib was! WHAT?!?! Seriously, kid? I couldn't get on the phone. I was baffled and speechless all at once. Wally explained the situation to him again and he seemed to be okay with it. Ben never ceases to amaze me.

When we returned home, we walked upstairs at 2 in the morning to find Benjamin asleep like an angel in his big boy bed. Wally and I gave ourselves a congratulatory hug and knew we had made the right decision. Welcome back sleep I have missed you. And on cue, Ben has just woken up.

*Fun Fact: Did you know that more than half of the 20-something males in my office sleep in a twin bed?

No Guilt

2009-05-18T09:41:00.002-04:00

Wally and I vacationed for the first time without Benjamin read all about it in my latest post for New Jersey Moms Blog:
http://svmomblog.typepad.com/new_jersey_moms_blog/2009/05/should-i-feel-guilty-for-my-childless-vacation.html
Would you ever vacation without your child? Would you feel too guilty to do so...

He Is Definitely My Son

2009-05-16T16:35:00.004-04:00

When Benjamin was born, I thought will my son be anything like me? Would any of my personality traits, mannerisms or habits be passed onto my son. Since he was a boy, I wasn't so sure but recently I have found that I didn't need to have a girl to have child that is just like me in many ways.
On Monday, Benjamin's Uncle John brought him three Lightening McQueen jerseys (football, basketball and hockey) from his recent trip to Disney World. Ben insisted on wearing at least one of them. Upon putting the football jersey on him, he ran to the mirror hanging on his closet door. He stood there for about a minute "checking himself out" in the mirror. I asked him if it was okay and Ben smiled at himself in the mirror and said, "good." My Mom also happened to be there to witness the mirror moment and commented, "he is definitely your son." Now, he can't get ready without looking at himself in the mirror to make sure he approves of his outfit.
Later that same week, I found a giant Mr. Potato Head containing about 3 additional heads and lots of noses, eyes, lips, ears and accessories that I had to buy for Benjamin. You see, when I was about Benjamin's age, I probably had about 20 Mr. Potato Heads that I played with but the thing I loved most about them was the yellow eyeglasses that transformed me into Mrs. Beasley, my alter ego. I would take those too small eyeglasses and stretch them out, don a pair of gloves, poncho and with a mirror in hand I would become a little old lady for the day (yes, my parents encouraged my creativity or craziness - I choose to think it was creativity). When Ben and I played with the Mr. Potato Head for the first time, he took a pair of those yellow glasses and put them on just like his mother. I was proud.

Vacationing With Ted And Cathy And Other Highlights From Our Vacation

2009-05-12T07:33:00.009-04:00

A few items worth mentioning from our vacation:
*We almost missed our flight because our "gate closed" 57 minutes before the flight was to depart. P.S. The airport was empty
*I rode for the first time in an electric cart to the gate that should be standard practice in my life
*Starting drinking screwdrivers as soon as I hit first class to calm my nerves. I would pay for that decision later that night - I'm not as young as I used to be
*The airline showed Marley & Me. I had to refrain from sobbing. I looked over at Wally and tears were streaming down his face. We needed more drinks...
*Our room was upgraded to ocean-view. Nice!
*The weather couldn't have been more perfect
*Ted Kennedy and J. Lo were staying at the property or two individuals who looked very much like them. Well maybe it wasn't them but it gave Wally and I hours of conversation. In fact, we came up with a new product to market while talking about J. Lo one afternoon. Thanks J. Lo!
*We met the world's most chatty woman. Ironically, her name is Cathy. It took me a while to connect "chatty" and "Cathy" - hey, I was on vacation
*Chatty Cathy tells me her life story after five minutes of meeting her. Keeps Wally and I floating on a raft chatting for over two hours. We wonder later why our backs are burnt to a crisp
*I beat Wally in a game of H.O.R.S.E. The next two times he beat me but I think he got up in the middle of the night and was practicing
*Wally surprised with a spa appointment
*My first nap in over 6 months (or maybe longer) was interrupted by a call asking me if I was enjoying my stay
*Wally surprised me with dinner on the beach. The surprise was almost ruined twice when upon arrival the event coordinator handed me the itinerary which noted the "butlered dinner" Wally quickly snatched it from my hands. The day of the dinner, we also decided to take a walk after lounging out by the pool and found a cart with flowers and such that I noted, "someone must be having a romantic dinner on the beach" little did I know it would be us
*We danced in the moonlight to James Taylor
*Wally ordered my complete dinner which included risotto, lobster and gnocchi. He does know me
*The romance didn't end when we arrived at our room which was filled with rose petals and candles
*Our romantic evening was interrupted twice by the staff. First, to find out if Wally wanted to put the dinner on the room account. Second, asking if we were enjoying our evening. The next morning we also got a call asking about the evening at about 8:30 am. Despite all the interruptions we did have once-in-a-lifetime celebration
*The guitar player/singer at breakfast is INCREDIBLE. Sang an acoustic version of Kenny Rogers "Lucille" and the Flashdance standard "Maniac" which was surprisingly good
*Each night we are serenaded by frogs "peep, peep"
*I ate a bagel and lox each morning - screw the diet
*We ate lunch almost everyday at the Jerk Center (INSERT JOKE HERE)
*Jerk Center cook made a special early morning run to get us Chicken and Beef Patties for lunch
*The chicken at the Jerk Center was the best I have ever had. Wally almost died from eating a pepper that accompanied his Jerk Shrimp dish. Johnny Cakes are the Caribbean hush puppy but better
*Wally is considering a work exchange program with the towel boy
*Wally taught me how to skip rocks and play horseshoes
*Wally and I spent about a half hour looking for a missing horseshoe on the beach
*We received a thousand blessings from God from our room maid
*I talked to Ben everyday on the phone. He missed his Mommy
*Wally and I talked and talked and talked about nothing and everything
*Wally had me falling in love with him all over again

The Anniversary Trip In Pictures (and a few words)

2009-05-12T07:09:00.014-04:00

Starting our vacation off right...
Wally romancing me on the beach with a butlered dinner

When bears attack!

An end to a perfect evening but wait there was more...

Wally pulling out all the stops

Love was definitely in the air that evening

Wally enjoying some time away from me while hitting the links

Taking advantage of the "all-inclusive" booze. Filler-up!

The world's most unfortunate name for a restaurant

Kiss me you fool or fish

A perfect vacation with the man I have loved for 10 years (well actually 12)

My Mom: The Natural

2009-05-10T07:55:00.007-04:00

There are some people you look at in life and think -- they were born to do that -- and often you can tell at a very young age. Whether it be born to be an artist or born to be a baseball player or whatever, there are some people who's calling couldn't fit them any better. My Mom was born to be a mother. She is a classic Mom in every sense of the phrase. If you have ever met my Mother, you wouldn't dare argue the point with me. In fact, you most likely would agree whole-heatedly -- my Mom is a natural - it is was what she was born to do.
There are so many reasons why my Mother is a Mom. I was just having a conversation with my best friend about our moms. We both said there is nothing our mothers wouldn't do for us and it is true. I can often hear myself saying "Mom I need to go to XYZ can you help me out?" The answer without hesitation is always yes. And sometimes the answer should be no but my Mom will rearrange her schedule to accommodate me. In a word, my Mom is selfless. There has never been a time in my life when my Mother has put the needs of herself before others. And sometimes, we don't deserve it but she is makes it her life mission to see her children and those she loves happy. When I look back on my 36 years, I am very fortunate to say there has never been a moment when someone hasn't been there for me and more often than not it has been my Mom.
I can say my Mom spoils me but my Mom likes to say she spoils us with love. I can rattle off a list of sacrifices my Mom has made to make me the person that I am today but I would be here for years. Suffice it to say, my Mom has the rare gift to love unconditionally. She has taught me the power of love and how to give it freely to others. While I have told her I hated her (lots in my tweens and teenage years) and ashamed looking back at it now, I never meant it and that didn't stop her from loving me with all her heart. Loving someone in this way is the greatest gift you can give anyone. The beauty of this gift is that it gives back and then some. There is no better way to live life and I thank my Mom for giving me this gift.
She is a kid at heart. My Mom is fun! I didn't and don't have a sideline mom. My Mom is has always been in the action. From frolicking in the ocean to creating arts and craft projects together to being the "class mother," my Mom has enjoyed taking an active role in my life and I couldn't appreciate it more. By taking on this role, she has supported me in all my life's pursuits. She made me believe I could do anything that I wanted in the world and never put me down. She has always been there with a word of encouragement, hope and love. Life is limitless with my Mom by my side.
My Mom is the one that my other friends look to as a friend and someone they can receive motherly advice from. When Kristi and I wanted to talk about the birds and the bees, we sat down with my Mom. When my friends now want to gossip about life in general, they can be found bending my Mom's ear. I love that my friends love my Mom. While I didn't realize it my younger years, but my Mom has always been my greatest friend.
She is the Mom that will do my laundry (and actually does Ben's for me to this day) and do it well. She is the Mom that can cook and bake like no other. She has made my life a joy. She made our house a home and an incredible place to grow up. I am not the daughter that will ever be seen sitting on the psychiatrist's couch complaining about how my mother ruined my life because I have been blessed with a "real" Mom - a Mom who knows how to do it the right way with all her heart. Thank you Mom today and always for being the best Mom a girl could ever dream of - you have made my life what is today.

Bon Voyage

2009-04-29T07:13:00.004-04:00

In life, you should consider yourself lucky if you have one good friend. In my life, I have been blessed with a handful of very good friends and one of them is leaving for London today. Jennifer, the one in the blue, is the first friend I made at college. While she thought I was a bit too wild for her liking, I eventually won her over by refraining from talking too much about beer chugging (yes this Mom can chug a beer). What we found was a friendship that doesn't come along very often. She is fiercely protective friend like the mother hen of the group. I recall once, in fact, I was just telling this story to someone who attends our Alma Mater, Jennifer getting in the face of a girl who was harassing me (she kind of had every right to because her boyfriend was cheating on her with me but that is another story) at our favorite bar. She told her in no uncertain terms that this was our bar and she suggests she leaves or she was going to be asked out by several of our friends who worked there. I also remember her getting into actual blows with another sorority sister over our friend Fran (believe it or not the demure ladies pictured above can fight). Yes, loyal she is and always will be.

Jennifer and I spent many a night in college and after college just talking about anything and everything. She is the person I can pour my soul out to - turn myself inside out and say this is me for all the good and the bad accept me for who I am. And what I like about Jennifer is she will always give it to you straight, there are no mincing words with this woman. If she something that you aren't being honest about or you are just plain screwing up your life, she will tell you and you are better for it.

As for what I love about Jennifer, she makes me laugh. I love her tirades. I love her GIANT heart. I love that she has chosen for me to be her friend. Jennifer, life will not be same for the next few months without you in the States and for this I have a heavy heart today. However, my heart soars for you and all the POSSIBILITIES that wait for you in London. Enjoy life and don't look back, look forward - always look forward. This is a once and a lifetime opportunity - take it for all its worth. And when you come back, the next exciting chapter begins but don't forgot to live this upcoming chapter to the fullest. I love you and will miss you but this is what life is about - adventure!

Ben Says The Darnedest Things

2009-04-18T09:51:00.005-04:00

Here are a few amusing things (at least to his parents and grandparents) that Benjamin has said recently:

*Benjamin woke up the other day and yelled downstairs to his father, "Daddy! Are you making breakfast?" Good question Ben.

*In the children's classic Goodnight Moon, there is an old lady in the chair whispering "hush." Since Benjamin has been able to talk, he likes to say the "hush" part. The other night the old lady didn't whisper "hush" but instead according to Ben she now says "SHUSH!"

*I might have told this story already but I looked back in my posts and didn't see it -- if I have go to the next bullet. Benjamin and I say our prayers each night. Each night we pray for people and things we are thankful for the most. The other night as we were going through our list of family and friends the third thing he said was "girls." I asked him to repeat it and he did, then I repeated it in a questioning way and he said, "yes Baba girls!" Now I ask that you pray for me.

*The other night I decided to hop in the tub clothes and all with Benjamin. As I sat in the tub, he turned around and said, "Mommy's too big." Even after the tub Ben told his Daddy, "Mommy's too big." I think I will stop eating now.

NJ Moms Blog: Church and Reality

2009-04-18T09:40:00.005-04:00

I've forgot to mention I have two new posts on NJ Moms Blog. The first is about the ups and downs of taking a child to church and the second being about the newest Real Housewives series -- The Real Housewives of New Jersey:
http://svmomblog.typepad.com/new_jersey_moms_blog/2009/04/church-children-and-praying-for-survival.html

http://svmomblog.typepad.com/new_jersey_moms_blog/2009/04/the-real-housewives-of-new-jerseyfuggadaboutit-rtp.html#more

Happy Easter Benny!

2009-04-18T09:34:00.005-04:00

Apparently, the Easter Bunny REALLY likes Benjamin Bunny. Not only did the Easter Bunny stop by his house but he also stopped by his Nannie and Popman's house, and the Easter Bunny's sidekick the Easter Beagle made a special visit to Grandma and Poppa's house. From an art easel to dollars, both gold and paper, Benjamin was thinking it was Christmas all over again and his parents were left to wonder where we would put all this new stuff...

To Dye For

2009-04-18T09:11:00.008-04:00

For the past two years, Benjamin has been an inactive participant in the Easter egg dyeing process. However on his third Easter in this world, he become a willing and eager member of the Easter Egg Dyeing Society. While I questioned his technique -- Drop and Plop (I am assuming it is very similar for most 2 year old), the eggs came out magnificent - egg-cellent in fact! Once the eggs dried, Ben and Wally got a little crazy with the stickers. Benjamin didn't like to share the stickers with the other eggs only one special egg got most of the stickers, and Wally just liked to put the stickers on everyone.
Aren't they egg-cellent?

Not The Day We Expected But Better...

2009-04-08T07:41:00.005-04:00

It was the perfect day to play golf. It was the perfect day to meet friends out for a leisurely brunch but neither happened that day. Instead, what did happen was a perfect day. While Wally and I both thought the day would be different and spent apart, we ended up ignoring our anger and having a day that I won't soon forget.

Spring had finally sprung -- temperatures had warmed with the sun shinning bright. What to do? Wally and I still feeling the sting from a fight the previous day were both in the "I don't know mode." I think we both realized at the same time that spring days like this don't come by very often in April that we needed to forget about what could have been and focus on the day.

We decided to head down the shore to Point Pleasant, along with about everyone else in the state that had the same bright idea. While there were plenty of cars on the road, we kept a steady pace and got to our destination in little over an hour. When we pulled into town, we knew that we would never find parking but with a little searching and willingness to walk we found FREE parking (a rare feat on the Jersey Shore). The day couldn't get any better, right? Wrong! In fact, it just got better and better.

Heading straight to the boardwalk, Wally and I both decided it was time to allow Ben to enjoy his first amusement ride alone. Up until this point, it was Ben and/or Mom/Dad riding shotgun with Ben in pink elephants and convoy trucks. This time Ben would ride alone. His first ride? Why friendly little Nemo -- who doesn't look so friendly when it is your only child's first "alone" ride. But Ben was cool, much cooler than his Mom and Dad.

Ben enjoyed more rides alone but did ride the pink elephants with Mom -- it was too high for a two year old by himself (at least by these parent's standards). Not only did we eat some fattening boardwalk food (pizza and fries) but we also only ate for $7 -- yes, a slight miscalculation may have been made on the counter girls part but who was Wally to correct her math. After a delicious and cheap lunch, we headed to the beach where Ben threw shells in the ocean and dodged oncoming waves that were reaching the shore.

Finally, it was time to head home but not without winning a prize. We tried our luck at ring toss where a guy was walking away with an electric guitar -- we walked away with an empty bucket. Next, I decided to try and beat a few water gun balloon racers. And beat them I did! Broken wrist and all. While they were only five and four, I still won and Ben left with a miniature doberman pincher. During the ride home, Ben, Wally and I tried out a few names on the new dog. Lots were rejected and we ended up with doggie. However, what we really ended up with, as I looked at the back at my sleeping son and happy husband, was a not the day we expected but better.

What Are Those?

2009-04-08T07:33:00.004-04:00

The other day Wally and I were getting dressed, Ben walked in and Wally had his shirt off. He asked, "Daddy what is that," pointing to his chest. I started to laugh and Wally said, "nipples." Ben repeated but in a questioning tone, "nipples?" Wally assured him that in fact yes they are nipples. For about five more minutes, laughing the whole time, Ben poked his father's nipples and repeated "nipples" about 20 times. Wally could hardly get dressed and out the door (and I think had some soar nipples from all the poking). Now Ben likes to show everyone his chest and yell, "NIPPLES!" I'm sure the day he points out a girl's nipples are right around the corner -- looking forward to that day.

This Is What Sorry Looks Like

2009-04-04T08:29:00.009-04:00

About three weeks ago now, Wally (by accident) broke my wrist and gave me a few other injuries. While he apologized, I had not yet received a token of his sentiment. The following weekend of my injury Wally said let's go the mall to get you a little gift. Guess what? Wally came home with a Fedora, pair of sneakers and a pack of socks. Me? A $15 headband (that I was rushed into purchasing because Ben didn't want to be in the store anymore). I guess when he said "little" he meant it. Thanks, I think.

On Monday, when I came back to work, I was surprised by the most amazing bouquet of flowers. From Wally right? No from my client who obviously loves me more than my husband.

As the weeks went on and I still didn't receive a proper "I'm sorry gift," I took matters into my own hands. When we were out at the mall getting some spring/summer clothes for my son, I pulled out my list of small designer wristlets I wanted to purchase. I marched Wally into Gucci and said which do you like better? After the decision was made, I told him to purchase the above item as a "get well" present for me. He did and the gorgeous little wristlet was sent to my office last week.
Moral of the story: If you acknowledge an accident right away with a card or flowers (without being prompted), especially one you caused, it will be cheaper for you in the end.

My Worst Week Ever

2009-04-04T08:09:00.005-04:00

Before I posted "This Is What Sorry Looks Like," I wanted to clue everyone in on my WORST WEEK EVER. I wish "best" was in that phrase somewhere but "best" was not to be found that week.

Monday - Flew out to LA not so bad. Couldn't sleep that night.

Tuesday - Sat in a conference room for 6 hours while the sun was shinning and the weather was perfect.

Tuesday Night - Took the redeye home to NJ so I could make a meeting at noon in my office (also to see my precious family sooner).

Wednesday 4:00 am - Woke up from a sleeping pill stupor to find that no we weren't landing just yet that there was an electrical fire on the plane. At that point, we were somewhere 2 hours outside of Newark (maybe near Chicago) and the plan was on fire. The captain told us not to worry he "believed" it was under control and oh yes he mentioned that there were plenty of airports to land in from here to Newark if need be but not to worry. Should I go back to sleep?

Wednesday 6:00 am - Hard landing. Another announcement to say the smoke was back and that we would have an "emergency escort" back to the gate just for precautionary measures. Here comes the ambulance, fire trucks and police cars.

Wednesday 10:20 am - I realize I am alive but I have missed my son's first dentist visit. Time to lie to the dentist.

Wednesday Noon - Now being told that we didn't get a big piece of business I worked my as* off on and that this new plan for another client stinks. Glad I came in.

Thursday through Friday - Much of the same.

Saturday 2:30 pm - Wally breaks my wrist (first broken bone in life) and gives me whiplash and sprained shoulder via an indoor playground bullying incident.

Saturday Midnight - Glad the week is over but won't actually find out about extent of the injuries until my two emergency room visits the following week....the fun continued.

Life is Highway: Ben's Rendition

2009-04-04T07:59:00.008-04:00

I mentioned in the post, "Four Ben Stories," that Ben has started to sing the tune from Cars' "Life is a Highway" (which was first recorded when I was in high school and I rocked out to the tune too). Here for your enjoyment is his rendition of the song

Four Ben Stories

2009-03-29T08:25:00.003-04:00

The series is back....
*When Ben is on the changing table and I need to get something, I tell him, "don't move a muscle I will be right back!" Yesterday, when we were playing outside he said to me, "Mommy don't move a muscle I will be right back!"
*I went to pick up sushi while Ben and Wally waited outside. While they were waiting, Wally went into the liquor store to pick up a bottle of wine. During that time, Ben struck up a conversation with a woman. Telling her how he wanted chips and how he went to the park that day. Apparently, he chatted her up quite a bit. When I came back down with the food, they were still in conversation. It ends up the woman is a speech pathologist at Morristown Memorial in the peds department. Unprompted (I swear), she told us he was very advanced for his age -- the fact that he was putting more than three words together (let alone two) in a sentence and had the ability to "recall" was incredible. So...I didn't say my son was brilliant the "expert" did.
*I had a bridal shower to attend on Saturday. Wally took Ben to the park. They hung out at the
playground for about an hour or so. Then they decided to check out the pond where the ducks and geese hang out. When they got there, they couldn't find any. Wally said, "I don't see any Ben." Ben said, "let me look Daddy." Ben got close to the water's edge and looked around. He then said somewhat defeated, "no ducks, no geese...let's go home Daddy." Damn you water fowl for upsetting my kid.
*As most children Ben's age, he has watched the movie Cars about 100 or more times. The other day, while with his Grandmother, he was playing with Mack and pushing him along the floor. She thought she heard him say something when she got closer she realized he was singing...."Life is a highway. I want to ride it all night long..." Now we make him do it all the time because it is so darn cute!

Why Business Calls and Two Year Olds Don't Mix

2009-03-27T13:37:00.003-04:00

I got two calls from my office yesterday while I was at home with Ben. Here's how they went:
Conversation #1
Me: Hi Chris, Do you think you could check out CheapTweet for me. I think they might be a good source for...oh, wait a second Chris.
Ben: Mommy my hands are sticky.
Me: Of course, your hands are sticky. You don't use your fork like Mommy told you to do.
(Chris patiently waiting for the exchange to be over)
Ben: I'm sorry Mommy for not using my fork.
Me: I'm sorry Chris for this I just....
Chris: Well, Jenn at least Ben has good manners.
Me: At least (I smile)...Ok where was I...Oh yes, can you look into that blah blah blah and get the address for XYZ client for me.
(Ben is now yelling and splashing in the background as I attempt to wash his hands)
Me: Sorry Chris I got to go can you just look into that and send me the email thanks.
Chris: No problem Jenn (in his mind I'm sure thinking that kid is a handful and you are the one that called me lady)
Conversation #2
Joyce: Hi Jenn, sorry to bother you but Tim wanted me to have you look at XYZ client's plan for approval
Me: Ok, Joyce you are going to have to give me a minute I was just about to walk out the door
Ben: Mommy get your coat on.
Me: Give Mommy one second
(Ben notices his toothbrush on the bathroom counter and wants it - I give it to him in hopes he will be quiet)
Joyce and I make changes to the plan.
Ben: Bruin I love you.
I turn around to look and see Ben brushing Bruin's fur with his toothbrush.
Me: Joyce you are going to have to hold on a second
Me: No, no, no Ben - you can't use a toothbrush to brush Bruin.
Ben: No Mommy!
Me: Please Ben, Please?!? Mommy needs to finish this call and we will go to the store and get you a gift now give me the toothbrush.
Reluctantly, Ben hands me the toothbrush and I hide it until I can throw out.
Joyce and I finish the plan with both glad to be off the phone.
Moral of the story: Ben and business just don't mix.

One Bourbon, One Scotch and One Apple Juice or I Like to Party with Stacy Becker...

2009-03-18T07:48:00.008-04:00

Not only do his parents like to have themselves a good time on St. Patty's Day but apparently their kid does too...

The Kamienski Family was invited by friend and colleague, Stacy Becker, to her annual St. Patty's Day Parade Party and party Ben did. As soon as Ben entered the room, he was handing Stacy a rose, high fiving a few guys in the room, and eventually, grabbing and distributing shot glasses to the crowd. Next, we found him doing shots of Apple Juice from a straw (he heard you get a better buzz that way) and picking a fight with Stacy's brother. We had to break that up and tell him to lay off the hard stuff for now -- the day had just started. Finally, I had enough when I saw him sitting on strange girls' laps and going in for kisses. It was time to leave the party. As he stumbled out of the Stacy's apartment yelling, "bye girls," I knew this wouldn't be the last of his partying days.

Lumpy The Snowman

2009-03-18T07:41:00.005-04:00

During the snowstorm, Wally, Ben and I made a valiant attempt at creating a snowman but the snow just wasn't right -- it was fluffier than it appeared. So the result was Lumpy the Snowman. The picture to the left is Lumpy on his final day. When we entered the yard the very next day and all was left was a hat, Benjamin asked me, "oh, no...what happened?" I told him, "Lumpy returned to the North Pole. Don't you cry he'll be back again some day. Thumpty, Thump, Thump..."

Zing, Zang, Puke! (f/k/a A fair assessment of the circus)

2009-03-18T07:34:00.011-04:00

As most of our weekends start out, Saturday morning of March 7th began with "Well, have we decided what are we doing today?" For some reason, my thoughts turned towards taking Benjamin to the circus as I recalled from being subject to highway advertising on my commute to work on RT78 with colorful billboards screaming "Zing, Zang, Zoom" promoting the 'new' theme of Ringling Bros. I went online and within 10 minutes purchased three $27 seats (the ones for $40 and $75 were also available, but no takers here, thankfully.) As an added twist, the event was at 'the Rock', new home to the NJ Devils in resplendent downtown Newark. We had heard good things about the arena and were looking forward to checking it out as well.

In what turned out to be a beautiful day with temps in the low 70s, we easily parked at a lot adjacent to the sparkling new arena ($20 bucks cash and I didn't even tailgate one beer) and trekked in past the one block radius of police issued barricades and SWAT vans. No kidding. After all, we were in New Jersey's largest city at 11am on a Saturday!

Benjamin seemed excited as we entered and made our way around what is a beautiful facility surrounded by hockey jerseys from local high schools and vending as far as the eye can see. Now in our seats on about the '40 yard line and 20 rows up on the aisle' we were locked in and all ready for what Zing, Zang, Zoom had to offer. It began as one would have hoped with a dozen or so large elephants making their way out from the curtain and zebras and horses running in circles all to the music and lights ol' Barnum could plug in. From there, it went steadily downhill with increasing speed.

What followed the animal 'act' was roughly 50 minutes of Mexican trapeze artists (announcer thanked the flying Lopez family when they were done), Chinese gymnasts, and Russian acrobats during assortment of tumbling and unicycle riding that left our 2 year old yearning for the exits and me wondering about outsourcing. To placate him during this hour long 'extravaganza', we walked him up to the top of the stairs, played extensively in our seats and waited for the real circus to begin. Ben pushed aside the apple juice (relatively unheard of) but was receptive to a Banana nut muffin I picked up earlier that morning waiting for Jenn to get ready (no comment). Ben was seemingly transfixed eating the muffin and watching the goings on when suddenly let out a choking sound, audibly coughing a few times and just in time for his Mommy's hand to get in front of his face, vomited the contents of one very chewed and somewhat digested muffin. His jacket was covered in it, his monkey pack (adorably pictured below) was puked on, shoes were coated in it, and our splattered seats never to be returned to again! As I ran him up to the men's room (which when the arena closes black felt during show time is as hard to find as getting the fat Lopez brother through as a flaming hoop!), all I could say to myself was Zing, Zang, Puke! (expletive deleted).

After Jenn, Ben and I effectively removed all traces of upchucked nuts and muffin and settled down to laugh about it, we can up with our best idea of the day. Get Ben a present and get the hell out of Newark. Animal-lover that he is, Ben selected a toy elephant with logo included ($15 cash) and made the best-sounding elephant trumpet noise I have ever heard. We then hit the exit with a whole new perspective on Zing Zang Zoom.

A Moral Dilemma

2009-03-13T15:49:00.003-04:00

My latest posting on NJ Moms Blog:
http://svmomblog.typepad.com/new_jersey_moms_blog/2009/03/stem-cell-research-a-question-of-faith.html#more
Are you facing a moral struggle on the issue of embryonic stem cell research? If so, please feel free to share your moral dilemma.

I Have A Bone To Pick With You Kai-lan

2009-03-02T15:11:00.006-05:00

In the past week, Benjamin has picked up a very nasty habit. Whenever he is playing with something, he yells, "mine all mine!" My otherwise very generous boy has started to become a bit selfish. Troubling to both my husband and I, we tried to determine where he might have picked up this not-so-flattering, in fact quite bratty vernacular. As we thought about it, we couldn't come up with a definite source to this new found behavior. As the problem seemed to be getting worse, we chalked it up to turning two. Until, as I was making dinner the other night, Wally called to me, "I know where 'mine all mine' came from Jenn." As I walked into the living room, Kai-lan with her big innocent doe eyes were looking back at me.
To be fair Kai-lan really isn't the problem - it's her buddy Rintoo that I have the problem with and his incessant yelling and carrying on like a spoiled child. As I watched the episode, Rintoo got more and more obnoxious. He repeated the "mine all mine" phrase several times during the episode. In the end, a lesson was learned and Rintoo seemed to be sorry until the next episode when he turned into a bad boy again.
Seeing Rintoo's behavior, I thought he might not have many friends left if he kept this up. I do know he has one less. As of yesterday, no more Kai-lan in this house until Rintoo cleans up his act. Sorry Kai-lan and Ho ho and the rest of the gang, you might want to have a serious talk with your buddy before your left with very few viewers.

Party Animal

2009-03-02T07:50:00.011-05:00

How do you celebrate the second birthday of your son? Well, you get about 60 friends and family together to party at the Turtle Back Zoo. And party, we did! With a tight itinerary and lots of help from family and friends, the day went off without a hitch. Feeding time started about 1:15 with everyone enjoying two 4 foot sub sandwiches, potato salad, tuna pasta salad and Cole slaw. And for the little ones the perennial staple, chicken nuggets. After lunch was served, we headed out to explore the zoo. From peacocks to a leopard to a GIANT pig, the expedition party got to see many animals that day. Benjamin even got to see a bobcat and porcupine two animals that weren't out the last time he was at the zoo that he has been consistently asking for all week.

After we visited the wolves and Ben did a dance by the black bear exhibit, we all headed to the carousel. Ben rode, what else, but the Okapi. The merry-go-round was a good time for the kids but the older folks (me included) got a little vertigo from the ride. In our defense, this was one of the fastest carousels I have ever been on in my life.

From the ride, we marched back for Birthday cupcakes where we were greeted by Yertle the Turtle Back Turtle.

Yertle joined everyone in singing "Happy Birthday" but soon had to head back to the Reptile House for another party later that day. With the goody bags given out and our final goodbyes said, we packed up the car and headed back home exhausted but completely happy!

He Started It

2009-02-28T08:31:00.004-05:00

A cupcake fight broke out on Benjamin's birthday with Benjamin leading the way...

Happy Birthday Benjamin!

2009-02-28T08:07:00.004-05:00

Growing up Birthdays were always a big deal in my house. From decorations to presents to family and friends gathered, it was always a day to celebrate you. When I had my son, I knew I wanted to keep the traditions from my childhood alive. And I am proud to report - mission accomplished for year 2!

Both Wally and I took the day off and while Benjamin was still sleeping, we snuck downstairs to decorate the dinning room. While it wasn't anything fancy, the twisted crepe paper hearkened my back to my girlhood birthday celebrations. When Ben finally woke up and Wally brought him downstairs, it he was in awe of his decorated dinning room - the balloons were his favorite.

The morning was spent getting some pancakes at IHOP. Though Ben, in true terrible two fashion, was not very pleased with the service and thought his pancakes needed to be there a little quicker than they were -- so what did he do? He screamed on top of his lungs. But it is his birthday and he scream if he wants to. However, tomorrow is a different story.

When then found a cool, retro toy store in Montclair called Just Kidding Around. We spent about an hour in there with Ben able to pick and choose whatever toys he wanted. We ended up leaving the store with a shirt, backpack, swimming monkey, wind-up lady bug and I think a few other things. What he really wanted was a tow truck (no tow trucks - even after the owners visit to the basement) and hasn't stopped mentioning it. I promised him as I was changing him last night and he asked me where it was yet again that I would get him a toy truck.

As the weather turned, we headed back home and had some lunch. We also played some more outside and in the basement. He then opened up a few presents from Mom and Dad. When he opened up his Max & Ruby DVD, Ben immediately wanted to view his two fav bunnies which was good because I had to shower.

Later that evening, family arrived and we wished Benjamin a very happy birthday complete with pizza (his favorite) and cupcakes (also his favorite). He also chowed down on hummus his favorite dip. Everyone had a blast but most especially Ben. As I looked around the room and saw all the smiling faces and then turned to see my son, I had to hold back my tears because as Ben blew out the candles (with the help of Mom and Dad) I knew all my wishes had come true.

It Happend To Me: Lastest Post On NJ Moms Blog

2009-02-23T13:30:00.004-05:00

Time for me to eat a little humble pie....
http://svmomblog.typepad.com/new_jersey_moms_blog/2009/02/rookie-mistakes-draft.html
Have you ever thought you almost seriously injured your child (by accident of course)? Tell me about it to make me feel better. Please. Feeling a little shy...I'll start it off for you by using my Mom (the world's greatest mother) as an example. My Mom almost blinded me in one eye when she put ear drops in my eye. She has never been able to forget it.

What Do You Get An Eighty-One Year Old Woman?

2009-02-23T08:32:00.005-05:00

Last week, when we called my Granny to wish her a "Happy Birthday", Wally asked her what she wanted for her birthday. She told Wally that she wanted a man that stands upright and knows how to keep his mouth shut. I say to that Grandma - who doesn't? Wally said in reply that he thinks he might be able to arrange something for her. Wally, in true Wally fashion, wants to make every one's birthday wish come true including Grandma's rather straightforward (somewhat impossible) request.

With plans to see her a week from her birthday, Wally set out on Saturday to find Granny the "perfect man." The search involved heading up Route 23 to somewhere in Sussex County. Who knew all the upright, quiet men lived in Sussex County? Apparently, they also live in a porn shop as well. Six foot five, all man, Wally came out of Sussex County's finest porn shop with "Steve" the construction worker.

Steve and the Kamienski family made their way down to EP with Steve riding in the trunk. We left him in the car until the right moment. After dinner when Grandma was receiving tame gifts like puzzles, books and flowers Wally made his way downstairs to get Steve and make the introductions. As my Aunts, Cousins, Mom and Dad sat around Grandma, we presented her with a card that said we were about to make her birthday wishes come true that is when Wally entered with Steve. My family was somewhat horrified but my Granny laughed her ass off and gave Steve a pet name half-and-half due to the fact that he had a black face and white body (go figure). Grandma left the party later that night arm and arm with Steve, the man that stands upright and keeps his mouth shut. Nothing like making your 81 year old Grandmother's birthday wish come true.

More Whys

2009-02-23T08:26:00.002-05:00

On Friday night, I was giving Benjamin a bath. As all little boys do (and big boys too), he began touching his penis. Yes, a very natural thing but often embarrassing for a Mom. Here is how our conversation went:
Me: Benjamin please stop touching your penis
Benjamin: Why?
Me: Because your penis isn't a bath toy
Benjamin: Why?
Me: Go ask your father
Benjamin: Okay

Why?

2009-02-19T18:34:00.003-05:00

The whys have started. The other night at dinner. Wally told Benjamin his new cup was not a toy. Ben asked, "why?" Wally began to explain to him the difference between a cup and toy. But that wasn't good enough. The question was therefore repeated, "why?" After several rounds of this, Wally grew tired and said, "because Mommy said so." I then looked at Wally but with a different tone to my voice and asked, "why?"

The Series of Four Continues...

2009-02-19T18:14:00.005-05:00

Ben seriously cracks me up lately. Here are four more Ben stories for your enjoyment:
1. I came home after work one day and I wouldn't (I mean couldn't) stop kissing his precious little face. He looked at me and said, "no more kisses Mommy!"
2. The Kamienski Family celebrated Valentine's Day at the Central Park Zoo. Since Wally's favorite bird is the puffin, the penguin/puffin exhibit was first on our list. In the puffin exhibit there were about a dozen or more puffins but one lone duck. A six year old came up to the exhibit and pointed at the duck and said, "a puffin Mommy!" Ben looked at him and said, "no duck." Don't mess with the world's youngest zoologist.
3. Ben ran his Dad's landscaping light over with his Fisher Price Power Wheels Lightening McQueen Car. Wally described it as a "real car accident" - you know the kind you see when the car's wheels are still spinning. Wally went up to investigate the scene. Ben said, "sorry Daddy." Wally told him to try steering next time and issued him a warning.
4. Benjamin pooped on the floor. Do I have to say anything else.

Did You Know?

2009-02-10T12:56:00.003-05:00

Did you know that Murphy's Oil isn't particularly harmful if ingested? Well, I didn't know that either until about a week ago when a poison control operator, nurse, medic, gyno and police officer all told me that it wasn't. Why did a poison control operator, nurse, medic, gyno and police officer offer me up this information? That my friends and family is an interesting story...
I was preparing to clean my hardwood floors so I took out the Murphy's Oil and left it on the dinning room table while I picked up the mop. At the time, Benjamin was playing in the living room (the room right next to the dinning room) with his Diego Rescue Station. When I turned around to pick up the Murphy's Oil Squirt and Mop, I was stunned into silence. My legs went numb and I was paralyzed for a brief moment as I saw my son squirting some Murphy's Oil in his mouth like a marathon racer. As I ran over to stop the scene, he made a wretched face and said, "bletch!" I knew I couldn't panic but I didn't know what to expect. Would Benjamin pass out? Would he begin vomiting uncontrollable? What would happen?
I thought I should call Poison Control first but I had removed everything off my refrigerator, including the Poison Control number, when we were trying to sell the house and all the fridge stuff never made its way back. As the seconds ticked by, I thought I needed to do SOMETHING. So I did what I thought was best and I called 911. I explained the situation and was told a police officer would be arriving shortly (I wish I had a tape of that call and wonder if I was as calm as Sully - NOT).
While I waited for a police officer and medic to arrive, I held Benjamin tight who just wanted to run around and play. The "not knowing" was killing me - I then took the number off the back of the Murphy's Oil and called their customer service line. I was transferred to the Poison Control Center in Pittsburgh. I explained to the woman what had happened and she said, "oh, don't worry it is just soap." My reply, "are you sure it is Murphy's Squirt and Mop?" PC woman, "yes, I am sure -- the worst that will happen is he might throw up." I was relieved but still a bit unsure. Just then the cop arrived.
The cop asked me a few questions and played with Benjamin and petted Bruin. He also reassured me that he was going to be okay. He then proceeded to tell me that a woman drank a whole bottle of Windex in an attempt to kill herself and believe it or not she was fine - unstable but fine. Alright, so maybe it was going to be okay. Benjamin announced the arrival of the ambulance.
The medics came in the house and asked a few questions as well. The medic told me that most of the time they just spit it out because they don't like the taste and if there was a larger amount ingested he might vomit.
In addition to the reassurance, I needed to sign-off on a form that says I refused medical treatment for Benjamin. I then asked, "in your professional opinion should I take my son to the hospital." She looked at me then looked at Ben who was running around in a circle laughing -- she said, "that kid? I don't think so." With that, I signed the paper and they left. I then received a call from a nurse at Colgate-Palmolive asking me if everything was okay. She also told me that the worst would be puke. If I hadn't asked enough people -- later that day, at a doctor's appointment, I asked my OB/GYN if I should be concerned and she told me the worst that could happen is some diarrhea or puke.
I learned a few lessons that day and here they are:

Murphy's Oil is just soap
Murphy's Oil if ingested will only cause vomiting or diarrhea
Keep anything and everything out of reach of Benjamin in order that he doesn't hurt himself or I don't have a heart attack
I should have a maid so I don't have to clean and have harmful/potentially harmful things in my son's reach (Wally it is for the best...)

Irresponsible Doctors?

2009-02-02T12:53:00.000-05:00

Here's my latest original post for NJ Moms Blog about my personal opinion on the doctors involved with the California octuplets:
http://svmomblog.typepad.com/new_jersey_moms_blog/2009/01/multiple-mania-and-irresponsible-doctors-rfp-octuplet-entry.html

More Buffalo "Tails"

2009-01-27T09:42:00.003-05:00

As most of you know, I now have a Buffalo living in my home. The other day as Benjamin was standing on the Buffalo and Wally asked, "Ben where is the buffalo?" Not knowing that the hairy thing he was standing was a buffalo (all flat, furry it could be mistaken for a Woolly Mammoth), he said, "I don't know Daddy." Wally asked a few more times and the same response came, "I don't know Daddy." After the third time, Ben left the room. I thought he might have been leaving out of annoyance but he in fact. He returned to the room with a shirt in his hand, "here is the Buffalo Daddy." After rummaging through his draw, he found his yellow shirt with a buffalo on it. Wally and I were both dumbfounded. I also half expected Ben to then say, "here is the buffalo Daddy now can you stop asking me where it is." Just for the record, Ben didn't -- I wouldn't blame him if he did.

My How Life Has Changed

2009-01-27T09:15:00.000-05:00

Here is a little quiz for you (multiple choice). Four years ago, if you had to guess where Nadia and I would be on Sunday afternoon where would you say:

a)The Mall at Short Hills

b) Brunch at Grill 73

c) Getting Manis/Pedis

d)Joining the Peace Corps

e)At Funtime Junction in Fairfield

I think we would have gotten more votes for choice (d then we would have for e), but e) is the correct answer.

This Sunday, Chanel glasses and all, we traveled with our two favorite boys to Funtime Junction filled with pint size boys and girls running around in just their socks. While it took a few minutes for Blake to warm up to his surroundings, Benjamin, the older of the two, was off and running and didn't stop for over two hours. Then Blake got in on the action and ran Nadia ragged while our husbands conversed in a corner about sprinklers, surveyed the scene and snapped pictures of the "funtimes."

It was special to see Benjamin acting like a big brother to Blake. "Come on Bake, Come on Bake," could be heard throughout the place house when Benjamin wanted Blake to follow him to the next activity. Benjamin also won him a turtle and was so proud to present it to him.

I hope Benjamin and Blake will grow up to be great buddies like their mommies are (not that they have a choice) but after today I think their life-long friendship has already started.

While it might not have been the Last Call Sale at Neiman Marcus or a delicious poached eggs, I couldn't have imagined spending a better day with friends who are more like family.

The Kamienski Family Is Ready For Their Close-Up

2009-01-25T09:01:00.000-05:00

The Kamienski Family now has a television station. Well, we don't have one of those fancy TV stations you can find on one of your local cable providers - we aren't that popular yet. However, we do have a You Tube channel that is filled with home movies (about 20 or more videos) of Ben, Wally and me. Imagine The Kamienski Chronicles but imagine them come to life in a shaky video format.
Cue the trumpets....Welcome to the premiere of Kamienski TV....
www.youtube.com/TheKamienskiFamily
Here is a little sneak peek from the channel:

Oh Give Me A Home...

2009-01-25T08:38:00.000-05:00

Is this really my life? Behold, exhibit A, to the left. If you don't know what Ben and Wally are lounging on that is a buffalo skin rug. No, I am not lying. I wish I was. I didn't realize it up until this point in my life, but this is perhaps my worst nightmare come true. Imagine a big smelly REAL buffalo skin in the middle of your living room and if you can tell from the picture my decor is not Southwestern or Dead Animal Chic. This lovely dead animal is now living in my home courtesy of my mother-in-law-a gift for Wally's birthday.

My problem both Wally and Benjamin love it. Especially, Ben he thinks it is the best thing in the world rolling around naked in animal fur. Wally might as well love that notion, but I pray to God, since he got this thing, that I may never see that imagine. Two year old rolling around naked cute - 39 year old man? - hmmmm, not so cute, but more on the disturbing side.

I do have to thank my wonderful dog. While out for breakfast on Saturday morning, we came home to find flying Buffalo fur. Bruin was punished by Wally, but secretly I gave Bruin a treat because now Wally realizes with Bruin we can't leave it in the living room (YEAH!). However, last night, I came home from a lovely evening out with my husband only to be startled by the buffalo. As I walked into my wardrobe room and turned on the lights, I found the dead animal on the floor of my favorite room in the house.

I want this Buffalo to roam somewhere else far, far away. I woke up this morning and it was still in the closet so it wasn't a dream/nightmare - it is real. Why me? And yes, apparently this really is my life.

Original Post for NJ Moms Blog

2009-01-23T13:56:00.000-05:00

Here is my latest post for NJ Moms Blog. Please forgive me for referring to the things that hang off the end of your feet as "tows" instead of "toes". I wrote it at 6 in the morning.
http://svmomblog.typepad.com/new_jersey_moms_blog/2009/01/to-punish-or-no.html
My Mom thinks it was my fault for what happened. What do you think?

Four More Short Stories

2009-01-22T08:45:00.000-05:00

I heard from friends and family that they really enjoyed the first four short stories (in general, I usually wax lyrical) about silly, funny, crazy, sweet things Benjamin does, so I decided it was time for four more. P.S. The picture has nothing to do with any of the stories but I just love it.

1. I was sitting on the floor doing sit ups. Benjamin got down next to me and put his hands behind his head and tried to do them too.

2. Last Saturday, Wally and I were both distracted by the frozen water pipe bursting in our basement that we didn't realize we left wine on the table. Benjamin walked into the foyer and was saying, "mmmm" he then ran away from me. When I went to follow him my mouth fell open, he was drinking Wally's glass of red wine. Please don't call child services on us - it was a rough night. I guess everyone need a little bit of wine.

3. Same night, Benjamin decided that instead of kissing me licking me would be much more fun. I hope that doesn't become a habit.

4. And finally, my favorite Ben short story from this week is while watching one of the Inaugural Balls Alicia Keyes was on performing Wally and Benjamin's song "No One." Wally started singing the song to Benjamin. When the chorus came back on, Benjamin sang "no one, no one, no one" to his Daddy. Yes, you can all cry now like I did.

Science Done Right LSC Style

2009-01-20T06:50:00.001-05:00

Science was never my best subject in school. However, it wasn't my worst either that was math. On a cold winter's day, the Kamienski Family had an opportunity to get in a few science lessons but this time free of exams and filled with FUN. Liberty Science Center hosted a sciencerific event for NJ Moms Blog, Philly Moms Blog and NY Moms Blog jam packed with educational activities that everyone from the smallest to the tallest could enjoy.
When we first arrived Benjamin was napping, so Wally and I decided to check out the first demonstration, Sub-Zero, while he was snoozing. We were able to relive our third grade science class all over again this time with real live clouds in the room. Check out Ben sleeping in the clouds.

After a brush with solids, liquids and gas, Benjamin opened his peepers and we headed to check out some live animals including a snake and a frog. Benjamin was very eager to pet the giant frog (this thing was HUGE and highly poisonous) and when he was told he couldn't, he wanted out of the classroom. So we left the VIF (very important family) area, and headed into the museum to check out I Explore, an exhibit made just for the younger set. I Explore didn't disappoint Ben nor Mom and Dad. We had a blast with the ball machine and rock xylophone and sand box which was actually filled with rice instead (good idea). But Ben's favorite had to be the exhibit that taught the little guys about amplified sound.

We ended the day at LSC with a trip to the moon with Elmo, Big Bird and the muppet from China (sorry I can't recall his name) by using our imaginations that and a mini-blow up planetarium that was impossible to get in and out of (wish I had video of 6'5" Wally crawling out of).

After hanging with the stars (i.e. Big Dipper and North), we bundled up ready to brave the cold with a little more knowledge in hand. Thank you Liberty Science Center for a making science fun for all ages.

The Bag I Am Carrying Today

2009-01-19T17:13:00.001-05:00

Like me, Total Mom Haircut writes for the SVMoms Blog but rather than blogging for NJ she writes for Philly because that's where she lives :). She wrote a great story called 'The Bag' about coveting a Prada but ending up getting another bag. She never revealed the bag but after some harassing she finally did. The bag isn't designer but it suits her purposes and is super sporty and functional. However, after the harassing, she tagged some commenters and asked us to respond to the following questions:

What bag are you carrying? and what do you have in it?: A Tory Burch tote that has everything from my keys to my laptop to tissues in it.

How much did it cost? It was $250 but it is so worth it. It makes me happy even in the winter. I got tons of compliments on it and I use it everyday.

Is there a story behind the bag? Yes, I asked my husband for a trendy computer bag because he hated my Vera Bradley one - he said it so wasn't me - it was too grandma. I got rid of the free Vera bag and got this baby for Christmas last year.

So that is the scoop...Remember no matter what size you are a bag always fits!

Firecracker

2009-01-14T16:56:00.000-05:00

I usually don't talk about my clients but I had to share this story. On a recent client call, the client did not realize my colleague was on the phone and I was referred to as a "firecracker." The way I see it is this, that is the nicest possible way someone can call me a b----.
Well on an email today, I finally confronted him on it. He had busted my chops about something so I thought I would return the favor by casually mentioning the firecracker crack.
He knew he had been busted so he said, "You are a firecracker--but a very, very good one. The kind they use to end the shows." To that I say, "BOOM!"

Things That Annoy Me At The Moment...

2009-01-14T16:53:00.000-05:00

1. Oprah
2. One Step Ahead
3. Redbook subscriptions
4. Cold Sores
5. The person who answers at the doctor's office

No Need To Apply. I've Got This One Wrapped Up!

2009-01-13T09:41:00.000-05:00

I think I might apply....Wally and Ben pack your bags!

SYDNEY (AFP) – An Australian state is offering internationally what it calls "the best job in the world" -- earning a top salary for lazing around a beautiful tropical island for six months.
The job pays 150,000 Australian dollars (105,000 US dollars) and includes free airfares from the winner's home country to Hamilton Island on the Great Barrier Reef, Queensland's state government announced on Tuesday.
In return, the "island caretaker" will be expected to stroll the white sands, snorkel the reef, take care of "a few minor tasks" -- and report to a global audience via weekly blogs, photo diaries and video updates.
The successful applicant, who will stay rent-free in a three-bedroom beach home complete with plunge pool and golf buggy, must be a good swimmer, excellent communicator and be able to speak and write English.
"They'll also have to talk to media from time to time about what they're doing so they can't be too shy and they'll have to love the sea, the sun, the outdoors," said acting state Premier Paul Lucas.
"The fact that they will be paid to explore the islands of the Great Barrier Reef, swim, snorkel and generally live the Queensland lifestyle makes this undoubtedly the best job in the world."
Lucas said the campaign was part of a drive to protect the state's 18 billion Australian dollar a year tourism industry during the tough economic climate caused by the global financial meltdown.
"Traditional tourism advertising just doesn't cut it sometimes and we are thinking outside the box by launching this campaign."
Queensland Tourism Minister Desley Boyle said some people might question whether it was risky to let an unknown person become an unofficial tourism spokesperson for the state.
"I think the biggest risk will be that the successful candidate won't want to go home at the end of the six months," she said.
"This is a legitimate job which is open to anyone and everyone."
Applications are open until February 22. Eleven shortlisted candidates will be flown to Hamilton Island in early May for the final selection process and the six month contract will commence on July 1. Job-seekers can apply online.

The Wonder Of It All

2009-01-11T18:18:00.000-05:00

I was sitting in the living room with Benjamin and Wally today. I picked up one of Benjamin's WonderPets and I asked Ben who it was. He answered me, "Tuck." I then proceeded to tell him that Bruin was a secret WonderPet. He told me, "no!" I asked if Ben was a WonderPet. He said no to that as well. Then Wally got in on it. He said, "are you sure WonderBen?" He shoke his head and said, "NO!" Wally then asked, "what about WonderMommy?" Ben said "No WonderMommy." That hurt my feelings a bit. But then I asked, "what about WonderDaddy." Ben said, "YES WonderDaddy!" Hmmpf. Well, I guess Daddy can save the day and the baby sea lion next time.

One Hump or Two?

2009-01-11T18:09:00.000-05:00

My parents and Mr. and Mrs. Galasso donated a camel for the church's new outdoor manager. With the donation, they were able to provide a dedication on a plaque. Wally's suggestion, "One Hump or Two." They went with "Christmas Blessings. Love, The Baker and Galasso Families."

Happy Birthday Poppa

2009-01-11T17:59:00.000-05:00

Today is my Dad's birthday and before we headed over to my parents, Wally and I began practicing with Ben to say "Happy Birthday Poppa." With each practice run it became clearer and clearer. As we walked into my parent's house, I said, "Ben do you have anything to say to Poppa?" Without any further cajoling, right on cue, he said, "Happy Birthday Poppa." I thought my Mom and Dad would burst with pride. My Dad's voice was a little shaky when he responded, "thank you Benjamin."

I also had been practicing with Benjamin singing Happy Birthday, but he will only sing it very quietly. So you'll notice, if you watch the video, you'll hear Mrs. Galasso's voice loud and clear but not Ben's voice singing. However, if I let the video go a bit longer you would have heard him singing, "Happy Birthday to Poppa." I swear!

My One Anniversary Request

2009-01-10T08:14:00.000-05:00

Yes my 10 year anniversary was a little over a week ago but I just got back to work and I have been slammed since I walked through the door I haven't had time to capture my anniversary weekend. Ok with the excuses over, here is the story. When Wally and I decided that it would be better to hold off on the BIG anniversary trip, we knew we wanted to spend a romantic few days just the two of us. So Wally asked me what I wanted and I told him, "I just want to ride in a one-horse open sleigh." I got the Jenn "maybe you need to be on some meds" look but I knew Wally would make it happen.

Why this request? Maybe it was hearing and singing Jingle Bells over and over again? But, the truth is that when I thought of something utterly romantic to do, this popped in my head. Now where to make this happen, we tried a few places in New Hampshire and most were booked and others I didn't nor wouldn't want to stay in. We then thought Vermont must have this activity a plenty. In fact, I thought that's probably how people got around in Vermont. We found a wonderfully quaint place to stay called the Yellow Farmhouse Inn (yes, it was Yellow). We stayed in the Stephanie - not sure why the rooms had Jersey Girl names but the room was darling. With our room all booked, Wally started calling around to a few places to arrange our romantic hot chocolate-filled ride and that's when the problem happened.

Apparently, Vermont had experienced a "warm-spell." THIS COULDN'T BE!!! Yes, there wasn't enough snow on the ground the day before our anniversary to go sleigh riding. However, they were expecting some snow during our stay but we would need to play it by ear. Wally in his truly positive nature said, "don't worry it will happen." As we began our drive up there, I was worried there really wasn't snow in Vermont. There was more snow in Jersey -- maybe we could have rented a horse-driven sleigh down King Street. But the miracle happened, just as we were 30 minutes outside of Waitsfield, VT it began to snow -- magical snow. I'm not talking Jersey-snow. I'm talking about snow that looks like feathers floating down from the sky. I'm talking about being able to make out the incredible shape of an individual snowflake. It nearly brought me to tears. After we got settled in the room, we started making phone calls to book this thing. Wally left a lot of messages and got one response, "maybe tomorrow, there still isn't enough snow." My dreams were yet again squashed.

The next morning after a perfect evening with my husband, I woke up to a winter wonderland. The snow was coming down and had covered the entire meadow. I got in Wally's face (who was still sleeping...oops) to say, "IT IS SNOWING!" Wally was like, "that's great Jenn. I need some more sleep." "No Wally you need to get downstairs and start calling a few places to get me that ride!" Why did Wally have to go downstairs and make a call because - 1. Our cells didn't get service in the area 2. There were no phones or TVs in the rooms. Wally eventually got up and made a few calls. Believe it or not, the news wasn't very good. Apparently, the snow was too "light". I can get into the number of reasons but it just aggravates me to think about it. Not giving up, we had our breakfast and packed and headed towards Stowe, VT. They, reportedly, had gotten more "packed" snow then the area that we were staying in because they were on the other side of the mountain. With fingers crossed, I called Gentle Giants Sleigh Rides and I got the news I was looking for, "yes, of course, we have sleigh rides happening today when do you want to come?" We made our appointment for 11:30 am and arrived about ten minutes early. The snow had just fallen and the sun had started to shine on the freshly fallen snow. There was a covered bride and a beautiful meadow -- this was it -- what I had dreamed of!!

Our horse was Justin, a Belgian and the biggest horse on the lot weighing in at 2200 pounds, and our driver was Ted, a man who had lived in Vermont his whole life on a farm except for a few years when the farm couldn't support two families him and his wife toured the country running out of money in Tahoe. From riding under a covered bridged to trotting through a meadow to "laughing all the way, ha, ha, ha", the 25 minute ride was everything I had every dreamed it would be and more. On the ride, we both realized we would need to come back and do it again not because we wanted to experience it again but because we knew that Benjamin would have loved it. We knew it was time to go home and see our boy. Thank you Wally for making my Anniversary dream come true. You are a prince.

Four Quick Ben Stories

2009-01-06T08:54:00.000-05:00

The other day Benjamin picked up one of Wally's leather belts and took a long hard sniff. After smelling, he went, "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh." He then continued smelling it. I guess he likes the smell of leather.

Last night, Benjamin did not want to wear the pajamas I put out for him. He only wanted to wear a t-shirt and needed a new pair of pajama pants but the kicker was he insisted on wearing his winter knit cap to bed. I wasn't going to argue.

For Christmas, as mentioned, we got Benjamin a fish tank. The other day he came into my bedroom laughing. I knew he was up to no good. When he left the room again, I followed him to find him putting his hand in the fish tank then licking his hands. I yelled at him. He laughed at me.

Same day, as I was straightening up my closet, I was bending down over my suitcase unpacking. Ben come right up underneath me and started moving the hair out of my face. After he was satisfied that all the hair was out of my face, he planted a kiss right on lips. I love that kid.

A Few of Ben's Favorite Things

2009-01-04T16:56:00.000-05:00

If you look back on your Christmas mornings, I am sure you will recall some of your favorite Christmas gifts of all time. For me my it was the Barbie Dream House (Childhood Christmas) and the snow scene picture that I pointed out to Wally while in Cape May as we passed a store window which Wally later found and gave it to me our first Christmas together (Adult Christmas). I can also recall friends and family's favorites as well like my brother's had to be the G.I. Joe Aircraft Carrier and recently when my Dad surprised him with a Sony Playstation 3. My friend Fran just told me her favorite was her Barbie Camper (that did rock). And I know, my mother's had to be the diamond wedding band (that she always wears) that was hidden in her stocking one year -- oh yes, and the Ben calendar she got this year :).
This year, Benjamin had a few favorites. In no particular order, here is the list:
"Fishy" - Translation Benjamin's new aquarium
"Pisty Cup" - The Piston Cup Race Track
"Choo Choo Train" - A plethora of Thomas the Train paraphernalia including a train table
"Cars" - A Lighting McQueen Power Wheels
"Cars Show" - A Lighting McQueen TV
Kind of see a trend...I'm sure the are more favorites to come for Benjamin, and when he looks back on his Christmas mornings of past, I hope he will recall a favorite gift from his childhood.

The Phrase Most Often Heard on Christmas

2009-01-04T16:48:00.000-05:00

The phrase most often heard on Christmas (and Christmas Eve and the day after Christmas) was "open please." After each gift Benjamin unwrapped, Ben would then want to immediately play with his new toy. Take into account, the child must have received about a hundred gifts (give or take) "open please" was never heard so much in my life or any phrase for that matter. However, it is nice he throws in the "please" for dear ole' Ba Ba. It could have just been "open."

The One

2009-01-02T06:59:00.001-05:00

Ten years ago today, I promised to love, honor and cherish for the rest of my life Walter Kamienski and I have never looked back. From the moment I met him, I knew he was "the one." This overwhelming feeling came over me the moment our eyes met. When we shook hands to great each other for the first time, it was like electricity went through my body. I didn't want to believe it at first (especially since he was there with someone else the first night we met) but when you meet your soul mate nothing can stop true love.

How do you know you have found "the one"? For me there are so many reasons. From the little, like covering me with a blanket when I am on the couch to the big like being there to hold my hand and comfort me when Aunt Dot passed from our lives. Wally has stuck by my side through it all - the good and the bad -- because not only did I marry the love of my life but I also married my best friend.

He has a way of making me see life from a different perspective. Sometimes he has to drag me kicking and screaming to see it but I do see it and appreciate him for making the effort like moving the living room around :). He makes me laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh. Even in the most tense moments of life, he can bring a smile to my face. When I was in the hospital after having surgery, I had to get up and walk around. One night when it was just Wally and I, he was walking me around the halls and I had an accident in the hallway (sorry for being graphic but I started to bleed everywhere). It was a pretty horrible situation and I cried. The nurses helped me change and I came out with a new hospital gown. Wally knew how upset I was and I guess he saw a way to make the situation better. The gown had a giant pocket on the front and well I was then known as "pockets." "Hey pockets what are you carrying in there? Some pencils and a notebook? Your money, a lipstick?" He made me forget about the accident and see the humor - the happiness in life. He makes me feel beautiful and special. Every time we are at a formal occasion Wally will whisper in my ear that I am the most beautiful woman there and I believe him when he says it. He makes me feel like there is nothing I can't do. He believes in me. From going on a new adventure like scuba diving to believing in me that I could and would get pregnant one day, his loyalty and encouragement have never wavered. He is my rock.

I've said this before but I think it is worth repeating. On the day I married Wally, I hoped and believed that I was marrying my soul mate but today, ten years later, I know it. Happy Anniversary Wally you are my true love, "the one" and soul mate. Thank you for taking life's journey with me. I love you with all my heart, now and forever.

Our Christmas Eve Tradition

2008-12-31T16:28:00.000-05:00

It started about four years ago when Wally and I had yet another failed cycle, and I felt I couldn't face anyone except him on Christmas Eve. It was just too hard for me to sit around with a smile plastered on my face while others shared in the merriment. I knew I had to do it for Christmas but two days in a row was just torture - I can only be so fake. That Christmas, I asked Wally if he wouldn't mind if it could just be us. He agreed knowing the pain he and I were both in at the time. We went to a later mass (7:30 pm) where I knew there weren't going to be many children present. What I failed to realize is that after the Eucharist, the lights are dimmed and Silent Night is played. Well, I cried and cried and cried but the thing is I still do even after Benjamin has come into our lives -- dimmed lights and beautifully moving Christmas music gets to me every time. After the mass, we decided to get something to eat with very little choices we got Chinese at Hunan Taste. We ate duck and had champagne then headed out to see some Christmas lights. After the lights, we headed back home and waited for Santa to arrive.

Not much has changed, we did go to mass earlier this year. With Benjamin having a breakdown and the Assumption being packed to the gills, I was the only one that remained until the end of church to hear Silent Night. Wally and Ben picked me back up 20 minutes after I called him. As the time approached 20 minutes, I started to walk home in rain crying thinking something horrible happened to Wally and Ben. When I finally saw our Tahoe high-beaming me in the middle of the street, I got in the car and burst into tears. I cried, "I thought you feel and were knocked on conscious and Benjamin was sitting there trying to wake you up, crying in the rain." While I sobbed, my beautiful son from the backseat said, "ba ba it's ok, ba ba it's ok." It took a glass of champagne at Hunan Taste to finally calm me down. And because we went to mass earlier, there was a huge wait at the restaurant. We made it through apps but Ben had enough so the duck and Seafood Country Style was wrapped to-go. We saw a few lights and headed home to wait for the arrival of Santa. And our Christmas Eve tradition continues.

Not Your Typical Grandmother

2008-12-30T09:49:00.000-05:00

You would never put my Grandmother in the "sweet, little old lady" category. Not that she isn't sweet. It's just that she isn't your typical Grandmother. Yes, she knits and reads bedtime stories but she also says and does some pretty outrageous things. Let's put it this way at my third grade "Grandparents Day" my Grandmother came in on roller skates and announced to the class with arms wide open, "I AM JENNIFER BAKER'S GRANDMOTHER!" I think she also bowed too.

Needless to say, holiday get-togethers with Granny tend to be interesting. Need examples? Here are two of my favorite. For some reason, the subject of funerals came up (not sure why). Grandma proceeded to tell her daughters and grandchildren that she would like a Viking Funeral. What is a Viking Funeral? It is when you send the deceased out on a wooden raft surrounded by fire kindling and from the shore line your fellow Vikings (or in our case friends and family) shoot flaming arrows at the raft so the raft and deceased burn and the ashes are spread in the Ocean. You think, "oh she must be kidding." She's not. So guess who is probably going to have to find the permit for this when she dies.

Perhaps my all time favorite, everyone thought it would be nice if Granny took a picture with all her many grandchildren. So as we gathered to take the picture someone commented, "boy there sure are a lot of us." Just so you have a frame of reference my Grandmother had 7 children. At that point my Grandmother says, "well, if I didn't like sex so much none of you would have been here." Need I say more.

This year was no exception, apparently she commented how she would really find an adult bib useful. So my Aunt Chris had one made up for her. Was my Granny insulted no, she actually loved it and asked could she get more.

People may call her crazy and some others have said she has started to lose her wits about her but I say I would rather be considered crazy than boring - it makes life more fun. However, I think Wally said it best on the car ride home that night, "Boy, I love your grandmother. People may say she is losing her wits about her, but I say the people that claim this don't have any wit themselves." You couldn't be more right Wally.

Choo Choo!

2008-12-30T09:19:00.001-05:00

While Santa might not have been a hit, the train ride certainly was for Benjamin. From the moment the train started to chug from the station, Benjamin was mesmerized by the scenes flashing by the window. He sat for almost an hour straight on his Dad's lap glued to the happenings outside. Along the way, he would call out the sites he saw like cars, digger trucks, Frosty, trees and birds.
The Kamienski Family gives the Santa Train a big "thumbs up" (minus the Santa) !

Benjamin's Thoughts on Santa...

2008-12-28T08:45:00.000-05:00

As I have been told by countless Moms, there is always a year when your child just isn't that into Santa. Don't get me wrong they love the gifts but if you try to sit them on Santa's lap or put your child in the arms of Santa an uncomfortable scene usually follows.
The Christmas of 2008 is Benjamin's year to feel this way. It started when I was shopping in early December and Santa must have been on a break and was headed back to the "set-up" North Pole in the middle of the mall. I motioned to Benjamin to check out Santa and I knew right away this was the year. My usually friendly son gave Santa a look that said, "don't think of coming too close big man." But in my optimistic parenting mind I thought, "maybe this will pass."
A little more than two weeks before Christmas, we booked a ride on the Santa Train at the Whippany Rail Museum. My thought was in a setting that Benjamin enjoys maybe he would warm up to Jolly Ole' Saint Nick. Wrong. While Benjamin didn't kick and scream like I have seen other children meltdown when faced by with being put in the arms of Santa, he did hide his head and cling to me.
So family and friends this is it, this is Benjamin's 2008 picture (see above) with Santa. I did admit to my Mom I felt bad that I didn't get the traditional mall photo with Santa and Benjamin. Maybe I should have tried but the thought of standing in a LONG line only to be disappointed and aggravated at the end didn't seem to be fun for anyone involved. My Mom agreed, "why torture him Jennifer?" Of course, there is always 2009 but I still love this picture because it has my favorite boy in it. Sorry Santa maybe next year.